Years ago, I bought this at a Flea Market, in Florida, on good old VHS, under the title The Chooper, having rented its evil twin, Blood Shack just recently. I wasn't quite sure what to make of that, although, I did assume it was the only thing the director ever did, I was wrong. I also assumed that it was meant for the entertainment of some guy, and his friends and loved ones, not to make money in the Drive-in circuit, wrong again. All I know is, Chooper is the superior of the two, so that's the one I'm going to review. In the end it doesn't matter which version is better, because, absolutely nothing in the history of horror, cult horror, exploitation, B-grade, Z-grade, experimental, nothing is more low-budget than Ray Dennis Steckler's greatest achievement. This is The Chooper.
The Chooper was created by Ray Steckler, a guy who has a thing for silent film, so there are a lot of voice overs, and naturally, things are pretty dry in the gore department. There is also an artsy, silent feel to the whole thing, and being in the middle of Death Valley makes this movie come off as if it hasn't even got a pulse, and it probably doesn't, but it does have heart (unlike Blood Shack). Chooper begins with a sunrise, followed by an incoherent rundown of the storyline by Carolyn Brandt. 150 years ago an Indian boy was killed near this old shack, a curse was then placed on the shack, whoever enters it will be killed very unrealistically by the Chooper, some kind of Indian demon, dressed in black. Of course none of this well-thought-out back story is ever mentioned in the movie again after Carolyn's explanation, instead we get Daniel, probably the only "actor" in this that took his role seriously, he works on the ranch right next to the Blood Shack, so, at some point he had anointed himself protector of the Chooper's domain, and scares off anyone who even thinks of entering, if he's not doing that he's usually picking up rocks, making some of those Texas-sized biscuits you like so much, or disposing of the bodies of the ones that are stupid enough to wander into the shack even after he clearly tells them "You will die if you go in there." Of course, wallets are usually included with the bodies, so it makes it all worth it.
Now Carol, sort of playing herself, arrives at the ranch, she recently inherited, I don't believe I've ever seen someone that wasn't in Troll 2, care so little about their performance, it's like she's in another movie. Near-by neighbor, Tim Foster drops by, demanding she sell him the ranch, Carol declines, Daniel is also against the idea simply because he assumes the Chooper man wouldn't approve, or maybe they had discussed it earlier, I'm not sure. Apparently, Carol just prefers walking around the windy desert all day with Daniel, while he struggles like hell to hold on to his hat. The movie now goes back and forth from Carol being harassed by Tim about selling, to Chooper killings, to the endless, totally uncalled for rodeo footage. There's really no way of spoiling The Chooper, it doesn't exactly have a real ending, it just kind of ends. Only hammered off grain alcohol could one truly comprehend The Chooper, trust me, you don't want to go in to this completely sober, at least not the first viewing It really does take an obsessive bad movie lover to see something worthwhile in something so pathetic, But underneath the imperfections, The Chooper has heart.
Heart or not, this is still, by far, the most unpolished, inept, obscure, grainy-looking, low-budget, pile of perfection in existence. The Chooper, on the surface, appears to be a whole lot of nothing, but it has a one of a kind essence about it, probably never captured on film before or since. Everything about this film (except the score) is desolate, dismal and hopeless, hence the location. For a more entertaining version of The Chooper, get it on the Media Blasters Shreik Show DVD and listen to Joe Bob Brigg's audio commentary to be enlightened on exactly everything that is wrong with this movie, and much more. And for a different type of comedy, watch Blood Shack on the Same DVD with audio commentary by Steckler himself. Steckler plays it off like this is some sort of horror spoof, I know a spoof when I see one, Steckler, your'e not fooling anyone. You took your best shot at suspenseful horror, hoping it would blend in with the rest of the no-budgets. The result is technically, a massive failure, a failure for generations of bad movie lovers to laugh at or stare at in awe, and also, for the occasional obsessive bad movie lover to truly appreciate. This film has earned itself a place next to greatness such as Blood Feast and Pink Flamingos. From the bottom of the barrel, and the ends of the earth. Filmed in three days, with a $500 budget. This is The Chooper, the worst movie ever made. 9/10
Updated 1/16/09: R.I.P. R.D.S.
The Chooper was created by Ray Steckler, a guy who has a thing for silent film, so there are a lot of voice overs, and naturally, things are pretty dry in the gore department. There is also an artsy, silent feel to the whole thing, and being in the middle of Death Valley makes this movie come off as if it hasn't even got a pulse, and it probably doesn't, but it does have heart (unlike Blood Shack). Chooper begins with a sunrise, followed by an incoherent rundown of the storyline by Carolyn Brandt. 150 years ago an Indian boy was killed near this old shack, a curse was then placed on the shack, whoever enters it will be killed very unrealistically by the Chooper, some kind of Indian demon, dressed in black. Of course none of this well-thought-out back story is ever mentioned in the movie again after Carolyn's explanation, instead we get Daniel, probably the only "actor" in this that took his role seriously, he works on the ranch right next to the Blood Shack, so, at some point he had anointed himself protector of the Chooper's domain, and scares off anyone who even thinks of entering, if he's not doing that he's usually picking up rocks, making some of those Texas-sized biscuits you like so much, or disposing of the bodies of the ones that are stupid enough to wander into the shack even after he clearly tells them "You will die if you go in there." Of course, wallets are usually included with the bodies, so it makes it all worth it.
Now Carol, sort of playing herself, arrives at the ranch, she recently inherited, I don't believe I've ever seen someone that wasn't in Troll 2, care so little about their performance, it's like she's in another movie. Near-by neighbor, Tim Foster drops by, demanding she sell him the ranch, Carol declines, Daniel is also against the idea simply because he assumes the Chooper man wouldn't approve, or maybe they had discussed it earlier, I'm not sure. Apparently, Carol just prefers walking around the windy desert all day with Daniel, while he struggles like hell to hold on to his hat. The movie now goes back and forth from Carol being harassed by Tim about selling, to Chooper killings, to the endless, totally uncalled for rodeo footage. There's really no way of spoiling The Chooper, it doesn't exactly have a real ending, it just kind of ends. Only hammered off grain alcohol could one truly comprehend The Chooper, trust me, you don't want to go in to this completely sober, at least not the first viewing It really does take an obsessive bad movie lover to see something worthwhile in something so pathetic, But underneath the imperfections, The Chooper has heart.
Heart or not, this is still, by far, the most unpolished, inept, obscure, grainy-looking, low-budget, pile of perfection in existence. The Chooper, on the surface, appears to be a whole lot of nothing, but it has a one of a kind essence about it, probably never captured on film before or since. Everything about this film (except the score) is desolate, dismal and hopeless, hence the location. For a more entertaining version of The Chooper, get it on the Media Blasters Shreik Show DVD and listen to Joe Bob Brigg's audio commentary to be enlightened on exactly everything that is wrong with this movie, and much more. And for a different type of comedy, watch Blood Shack on the Same DVD with audio commentary by Steckler himself. Steckler plays it off like this is some sort of horror spoof, I know a spoof when I see one, Steckler, your'e not fooling anyone. You took your best shot at suspenseful horror, hoping it would blend in with the rest of the no-budgets. The result is technically, a massive failure, a failure for generations of bad movie lovers to laugh at or stare at in awe, and also, for the occasional obsessive bad movie lover to truly appreciate. This film has earned itself a place next to greatness such as Blood Feast and Pink Flamingos. From the bottom of the barrel, and the ends of the earth. Filmed in three days, with a $500 budget. This is The Chooper, the worst movie ever made. 9/10
Updated 1/16/09: R.I.P. R.D.S.