1/10
I never knew Schwarzenegger could drive me so crazy!
25 July 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Ahhnold has had some pretty bad parts in movies before, but this one has to be his worst. Anybody who's read the Batman comics or seen the animated series knows that the Governator is not suitable for the part of Mr. Freeze. However, it really doesn't matter who would have played the part because the character's lines are written so terribly that it makes him seem like a total idiot rather than an intelligent scientist like he's supposed to be. Throughout the entire movie, he delivers enough cheesy puns to make you want to rip your hair out ("The ice man cometh!", and "Let's kick some ice!" to name only a few). That alone makes the movie very hard to sit through without breaking the television set.

The other elements of the movie aren't nearly as aggravating, but at the same time, they not very well done either. This movie reminds me a lot of the Fantastic Four movies, as well as many other lousy action movies of the past 10-15 years. It offers an endless amount of extremely far-fetched action sequences with paper-thin characters.

The biggest problem with Batman & Robin is the screenplay and the storyline, which both seem like they were written by a five-year-old, and director Joel Schumacher is also to blame for allowing such terrible writing. The actors try their best to do well at their parts, but they're offered such awful dialog that doesn't mentally or emotionally lead them anywhere throughout the movie, and Joel Schumacher probably wasn't much of a help either, so I'm sure it was difficult for them to learn how to work their roles. George Clooney's Bruce Wayne/Batman goes through none of the emotional turmoil that Michael Keaton's, Val Kilmer's, and Christian Bale's do in the other Batman movies. Instead, he's always talking down to Robin, and Robin just keeps whining like a spoiled brat and complaining about the same things over and over ("I want a car!", "I want my own robin signal in the sky!", "I'm tired of always following you around, Batman!").

Another problem with this movie is that there are way too many characters, and there's not enough involvement or depth to any of the characters for us to really care about them. Alicia Silverstone is only in the film for about five minutes. I like Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy because she actually fits her part, unlike Arnold does for his, but all she pretty much does in the whole movie is blow perfume at all the men to make them fall in love with her. Bane is the biggest example of a character who is paper-thin and underused in the film. I've never read the Batman comics, and I don't remember Bane in the cartoon, but I'm pretty sure that the Bane character is meant to be more than how he's displayed in the movie as a giant Hulk Hogan figure who talks like a caveman.

The bottom line is that Batman & Robin is very poorly done compared to all the other Batman films. The only positive comment I can make about it is that Alfred is involved in the story more than he usually is. I just watched this movie again for the first time in eleven years last night, and as you can see, I didn't like it too much. However, I remember enjoying it more when I was nine years old and I saw it in the theater. So if you're a child, then you might like this movie. You also might like it if you enjoy other sloppy action movies like Alien vs. Predator. Otherwise, unless you want to see how cheesy and irritatingly poor a Batman film can possibly be (this is even more cheesy than the T.V. show was), don't bother to add Batman & Robin to your Batman movie collection.
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