Review of Iron Man

Iron Man (2008)
1/10
I must need a shot of testosterone or something
5 August 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I don't understand why I am supposed to like this movie. What facet of my personality, dreams or desires is this film supposed to appeal to? American war mongering blood lust? Chauvinistic bravado? The need to dehumanize foreign cultures? I don't have much of that it in me , so the Afghan location was beyond offensive. It's no small wonder my sad, pathetic country engages in these brutal, illegal actions with so little questioning from its citizens when I see the high rating this movie gets here. Usually I trust this site, but this is just bizarre. Even if I was the biggest flag waving Type A male chauvinist pig, I'm sorry, this movie would still suck. The plot is unbelievable from the get go. A military supply company founder/inventor is a celebrity that everybody knows and wants an autograph from? Ridiculous. Under the watchful eyes of surveillance cameras a supposed missile instead takes on the shape of the prototype body super-suit that it actually is without anybody noticing? A man who made killing machines all his life suddenly decides to make a machine that's "not a weapon?" How is it not a weapon, and when did Stark have this epiphany that changed his entire outlook on life? Maybe I was rolling my eyes during that scene and missed it. A hard-hitting reporter suddenly decides to jump in the sack with Stark? Don't ask me, I'm just a girl! hee hee hee. Totally ludicrous and disrespectful to women. And why did Gwyneth's character need to be in this movie? Why did his friend and partner suddenly become a bad guy? And if he wanted to kill Stark, maybe it would have been easier if he had utilized one of those many occasions when his suit was off.

Conveniently for the flag wavers, Iron Man flies off to spread freedom in a sad little country that needs a big American hero to help them. More appropriately, perhaps he could have disrupted an illegal American interrogation or U.S. shooting/bombing of innocent civilians. That surely has caused the death and suffering of many thousands more than this ridiculous caricature of an Afghan war lord ever could/did.

I'm still not sure if I watched a movie, or a U.S. Marines enlistment commercial.
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