Cathy's Curse (1977)
2/10
Cursing Cathy
13 December 2009
Uttterly unwatchable dreck that's plagued by a serious degradation of the original copy. The movie is in a constant orange hue that I began to wonder if this was actually filmed on Tang. It doesn't really matter anyway as the poor editing which appears to be done by hyperactive toddlers renders most of the plot useless regardless of the clarity of the picture.

The story begins with the father and sister of George Gimble who were apparently abandoned by George's mother who took the young George with her. The dad gets into his car with the young girl in pursuit, one might gather as his motivations are never addressed (they could be going to Pizza Hut for all I know), when a rabbit in their path causes them to swerve off the side of the road into a small embankment which of course causes the car to go up in flames. Flash forward to the now adult George who has returned to his childhood home along with his wife Vivian and his daughter Cathy. Left to investigate her new home on her own, which happens a lot mind you, Cathy comes upon a doll with her eyes sewn shut that for some reason she becomes infatuated with. Turns out this doll holds the tormented soul of George's dead sister Laura who transfers her powers of telekinesis along with her virulent hatred of women over to Cathy. Wouldn't that make this Laura's curse instead of Cathy's? You might want to look into that. Anyway, Cathy begins her reign of terror as she maims and murders any living thing in sight along with the occasional "bitch" or "whore" peppered in for good measure. This provides the lone amusing scene as Cathy verbally abuses an admittedly creepy medium along with the drunk handyman Paul who really looks like Mick Fleetwood.

It was approximately two seconds after Vivian screeched her first line about her nervous breakdown that I wanted her to die first. I would compare her voice to nails on a chalkboard except for the fact that even that would be the sound of angels singing next to the grating effect of her New Joisy accent. She bitches and moans the whole movie: "George I heard the do-awg barking, the do-awg" or her complaint that someone is watching her from the yard even though her back is to the window. At one point she watches Cathy teleport multiple times in front of her to which she responds by irritation rather than open-jawed disbelief. In her defense she gets no help from her useless husband George who does absolutely nothing throughout the film except refer to his construction job that requires a shirt and tie. A neighborhood medium introduces herself to Vivian, holds a photo of George's father, goes into a violent flashback trance of the car crash complete with speaking in different voices, and then acts like nothing happened. What parallel universe do these people live in? Or is this just typical of Canadian suburbs? Scenes are edited so abruptly, like whenever the doll moves on its own, that Cathy's Curse resembles more a flipbook with random drawings rather than a movie. On top of the picture quality, editing, and poor character development is the sound effects that go from obnoxious to down right earsplitting such as George's electric razor and the constant crackle of "silence" that resembles someone running a shower inside the room. The only reason I made it through this film in one viewing is the fact that it was about five degrees outside and the thought of shoveling all of that global warming snow wasn't enough to get me to turn this crap off. But not by much.
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