Mr. Billion (1977)
2/10
A Messy Adventure
21 February 2010
In this awful late 70's cross country adventure film, Italian actor Terence Hill plays Guido Falcone, the recipient of his recently deceased uncles estate. Guido lives in a small village in Italy where he fixes cars for a living. He is visited by John Cutler, his uncles former right-hand man at the Falcon Bank in San Francisco. He informs Guido that he has 20 days to make it to San Francisco, or the inheritance will be null and void. Soon Guido is in New York and Cutler is back in San Francisco. Cutler has his greedy eyes on Guido's money and new found power at the bank. So he hires the sexy Rosie Jones to seduce Guido on his was to California, and trick him into signing over power of attorney to Cutler. What follows is an episodic cross country lark involving kidnappings, cowboys, explosions, bar fights, car chases, gunfights and other misadventures.

This movie might have been tolerable if the leads could actually act. Terence Hill and Valerie Perrine are embarrassingly bad. Watching Terence Hill in this made me wonder if the directors just grabbed the first decent looking Italian guy they could find, rolled camera, and told him to read the cue cards.

Valerie Perrine, most well known (and funny) as Lex Luthor's main squeeze in the first two 'Superman' films, borders on bad camp in this. I must say her scenes were funny but not for the reasons intended. Her introduction scene is notably guffaw worthy.

But sadly, this isn't a good movie to watch to laugh at. Although there are a few unintentional howlers here and there, most of the movie is just plain boring.

There are some good aerial shots along the way, and Slim Pickens makes things a little more fun when he's on screen, but all in all this is a true dud.
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