Doutzen Kroes is beautiful, yes. She is even beautiful enough to carry the entire movie, but not on her push-up bra alone. Director Oerlemans put her in the film to give the male audience a reason to buy a ticket. I did not (I watched on DVD), and so I missed the 3D-effects. Just like I missed the polar bear. Turns out I haven't missed anything at all. The original story is exciting enough, but Oerlemans manages to make it a child's tale, and a boring one for that matter. The reason is in Oerlemans' view towards his audience. He produces so much crap with his Eyeworks-company that he is convinced all people want to see is crap. Just look at the pictures provided with Nova Zembla on IMDb to understand who Oerlemans considers to be his biggest star: Oerlemans himself. All Oerlemans ever does, is promote himself, hoping that one day we will believe him. The media hype in The Netherlands when Nova Zembla was launched was utterly embarrassing. Look at Arnie go! Look at Arnie with the real Spielberg-beard! One Big Oerlemans-commercial, broadcast every evening for weeks in a row. I am very sorry for all the (good) actors in the movie and for Doutzen Kroes and Semmy Schilt, who are not actors. Just as Oerlemans is no director.
Review of Nova Zembla
