"They lose their neshama (the soul), they live a life which destroys us internally." - the reality that many Orthodox and Hasidic Jewish gay people have to face throughout their life. "Trembling Before G-D" discusses one of the most arguable questions, which hasn't lost its relevance up to these days, by looking into the lives of gay people who find themselves balancing between properly following Judaist beliefs and continuing to be who they are. This question of personality or neshama, the soul in Hebrew, remains to be relevant not only to Judaism, but to other Abrahamic religions as well. This said, the documentary breaks the ice on the topic of religion and homosexuality in Judaism - the movie sets its own pace by developing the discussion basing on the experience of people in the absence of author's external influence.
First of all, I find it important to say that I possess a little knowledge about Judaism and I have secular views towards religion in general. Therefore, I really hope to have no bias towards the current topic. Having said that, I want to set the starting point of this review at the conflict between homosexuality and the religion. It is permittable for a person to be gay, but it is not permittable to engage in homosexual activity. In fact, it is said in Torah: "And if a man lies with mankind, as with womankind, both of them have committed a detestable act: They shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them", or in other words those who engage in such activity should be punished by death. Therefore, being homosexual is viewed as having a burden to carry though the whole life and undermine any intimate relationship with the same sex. This looks pretty much exclusive, as if Torah excludes gay people from sharing their and receiving feelings of love or joy, even though it was the God who created them homosexual. As one of the interviewees questions if "Joy is only being straight and having children", in my mind, I came up with another question of whether these religious gay people become martyrs for the sake of Hashem, the God, - not only in the meaning of Kiddush Hashem and "sanctification of God's name", but also in the meaning of disregarding their personal desires for the sake of the God. What I see is a paradox, since religious gay people have more desires to overcome during their service to the God, compared to heterosexual people who are free to have intimate relationship once they create a family. If Judaism had merits to assess people's actions as Buddhism has, then I should say that gay individuals who undermine their sexual desires and follow Judaism and Hashem would attain more merits through their life.
However, what about the people who do want to have intimate relationship with their partners of the same sex? What Judaism has to offer them? It happens that no such option exists, and these individuals have to find their own way to combine the teaching of Torah with their views. The conflict here is between the religious values and the reality of being gay, the individual's neshama and Torah's teachings or requirements, as I perceive them, written down by Moses. The popular argument about homosexuality about its 'unnaturality' comes to mind as I see its response in Torah. It seems that Torah abandons homosexuals in the same way as it labels penguins to be impure in Leviticus, despite that both of these creatures were created by the God. But what about the natural instincts? One Rabbi in the movie said that "There is no reason for an instinct". Therefore, can we say that sexual desires of gay people cannot be blamed or judged? Even if the answer is yes, this will most probably cause a great disagreement from the majority of Judaist followers due to their conservative views. Nevertheless, if we consider these words from the movie: "God engages with human beings. God listens to them and understands. It is not Judaism if it's not responsive to human condition.", they are based on the example of Moses and other prophets who have engaged with the God and sometimes had influence on him (or may be her). At the same time, to what extent can one question the genuineness of Moses' interpretation of the God's words. I mean, what if Moses belonged to the gay minority in Judaist society? Would his views on God's will remain the same or what influence could he make on the God? It seems like, if the modern Judaist authority agrees that the God can learn from the human, it would still be reluctant to agree on rewriting the Thora and accept the faith of homosexual Judaist at the equal level.
So, it happens that the documentary gives rise to even more questions, rather than gives concrete answers. However, these questions, which have often remained unasked, represent an important move to increase the awareness about the problems that gay minority in Judaist society is facing. Can Hashem, the knower of secrets, truly understand this exclusion and guide people towards more inclusive solution? I guess the time will show. Before that, these people will continue to tremble before the God.
Review of Trembling Before G-d
