1/10
Out of the entire Krampus franchise, this is the absolute worst.
29 January 2019
Warning: Spoilers
This movie definitely deserves one star! As a fan of horror including terrible B movies, this film had no redeeming qualities. It seems to have been made by the same studio that made Krampus: Unleashed, which was only slightly better with 2 stars.

These two films tie into the same universe because of the backstory involving Arizona, which probably was just written in because that's where the people who filmed it lived so they decided to place it there, even though Krampus is a Germanic folklore demon, from Germany.

So, how does Krampus end up in the desert? Well, this movie will tell you, but in a very slow, boring uninteresting and uncreative way. They couldn't even write in an interesting way to get the German demon to the USA. The introduction opens somewhere in Germany during world war, where it shows some crazy German dude with a fancy necklace and a book screaming random stuff, he and everyone else gets shot, and the bodies of the US soldiers are sent back to the states. One soldier's wife, a teacher in Arizona, is sent her husbands belongings, which just happen to include the German book and necklace.

The first hour of the film is less like a horror movie and more like a very boring biopic of 1900's Arizona as we learn about their beliefs of the time, and how the orphanage they work at operates. It isn't until you get near the end that the story even has literally anything to do with Krampus. It's almost as if they started filming a story about an orpahange in early Arizona days, realized at the end that it would literally make people's eyes bleed from boredom, and decided to throw in Krampus in the last few scenes to write it off as a horror story instead. Then, when he finally appears, it is really just flashy colors or a still shot that depict the Krampus. No murder or anything even takes place, just scenes of people running, falling, screaming, and then the assumption that Krampus killed them, it's really absolutely terrible. I mean, I truly believe a B movie can be totally redeemed from its crappy graphics and usually bad acting and soundtrack with originality and gore, but this movie offers neither. Krampus himself looks like a guy in a black paper mache' mask with some flames edited in his eye sockets, and you don't actually see Krampus move around or anything, all you see is a scene of his face he kinda rocks back and forth, and the rest of the time, he is in the form of an evil looking little boy, or the screen flashes color (you know, because flashing colors means murders are going on!! you just can't see them).

At the end Krampus basically disappears* everyone except the teacher, because she had the German necklace the first guy was waving around and screaming about and for some reason Krampus can't kill whoever has the necklace. But then she manages to banish Krampus somehow despite only having just learned about him and the amulet 2 minutes beforehand and everyone pops out of thin air so Krampus really didn't do any damage at all and the whole thing was pretty pointless since they all lived happily ever after anyway.

The drunk priest wins award for best actor, everyone else was terrible. This was like a bad boring episode of little house on the prairie.
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