I recognised the poster, having seen it somewhere before, and I recognised the leading actor as the voice of Slinky the Dog in the first two Toy Story movies, it was only reading up on it that I found out more about the leading character. Ernest P. Worrell was an established long-running character from a many American commercials, before appearing in ten feature films (four straight-to-video), this was the fifth film to feature the character. Basically, in Briarville, Missouri in the late 19th century, Trantor (Jonas Moscartolo, voiced by Ernie Fosselius) is a demonic troll who transforms children into wooden dolls to feast upon their energy. He is captured by the townsfolk and sealed under an oak tree by an ancestor of the Worrell family. Out of vengeance, Trantor utters, that one day he will be released on the night before Halloween by one of the Worrell family, and that every generation of Worrells will get "dumber and dumber and dumber", until the dumbest member of the family is foolish enough to release him. One hundred years later, Ernest P. Worrell (Jim Varney) is a sanitation worker. He helps his middle school friends Kenny Binder (Austin Nagler), Elizabeth (Shay Astar) and Joey (Alec Klapper) to construct a tree, unknowingly in the same tree that the dormant creature is trapped beneath. Old Lady Hackmore (Eartha Kitt), who is knowledgeable about witchcraft and ancient creatures, is angry about this construction and tells Ernest the story of Trantor. Inadvertently, Ernest releases the troll. Joey is walking home from the tree house when he falls into a muddy hole and is grabbed by Trantor, who turns him into a wooden doll. Ernest finds Sheriff Cliff Binder (Daniel Butler), Kenny's father, and explains the situation but they do not believe him. After none of the townspeople will help Ernest because they are focusing on the Halloween party, he mounts a one-man (and one-dog) defence operation to go against the troll. Meanwhile, Trantor captures a boy on a skateboard who becomes his second victim. Local brothers Tom (John Cadenhead) and Bobby Tulip (Bill Byrge) take advantage of Ernest and sell him a variety of fake troll traps. One of them backfires on the sons of Mayor Murdock (Larry Black) and Ernest is fired from his job. Ernest, Kenny, and Elizabeth return to Hackmore, where they learn that "the heart of a child, and a mother's care" are the only things that can defeat the troll. Later that night, Trantor claims Elizabeth as his third victim, sneaking into her house. While Kenny and his friend Gregg (Steven Moriyon) are walking, Trantor uses Elizabeth's voice to lure Kenny away, then takes Gregg as his fourth victim. Despite parents being upset at their missing children, Mayor Murdock and Sheriff Cliff Binder go ahead with the Halloween party at the school and they believe the missing children will show up. Trantor appears there and takes the mayor's oldest son as his fifth and final wooden doll. In the ensuing fight between Trantor and Ernest, Trantor turns Ernest's dog Rimshot into a wooden doll before being driven away by ice cream on Ernest's hands. Back at the treehouse, Trantor successfully summons his army of trolls. Ernest tries and fails to stop them, and the townspeople show up. However, the trolls overwhelm and beat them up. Kenny, who has realised that "mother's care" refers to milk, has rallied a team of troll-fighting kids to destroy them. Kenny and his friends use milk in water pistols and in cartons to throw onto the monsters, causing them to disintegrate into mounds of slime. During the fight, Trantor escapes beneath the tree where he summons the powers of the underworld, making him invincible, and impervious to milk. Kenny unsuccessfully tries to destroy Trantor and is turned into a doll as well. With the rest of the townsfolk now backing him up, Ernest realises that Trantor himself would be weak against unconditional love: "the heart of a child." He takes Trantor and dances with him while the mob watches, filling him with as much love as possible and finishing it off with a kiss to his snot-ridden nose, which causes Trantor to explode. With Trantor's destroyed, the wooden children and Rimshot are restored, including folks from the early 19th century, Ernest is proclaimed a hero, and life returns to normal. Also starring Jackie Welch as Teacher. Varney is the big draw for this film, from the many amusing faces he pulls in the horror movie montage opening, to his gravelly voice, simpleton personality and impressions of stereotypical characters in costumes, while Kitt is a bit too strange to take seriously. It is a predictable story about an ugly ancient being wanting to take over the world turning kids into dolls for his collection, and the stupidest man in town is the only one who can save the day, there are slapstick and visual jokes that will give the family giggles, and the leading character is very likeable, but otherwise this is a silly comedy horror. Adequate!
Review of Ernest Scared Stupid
