Finder's Fee (2001)
3/10
Extra Thick
21 October 2021
Warning: Spoilers
This movie could not have been more contrived. Everything about it cried "theatrics." Was this a play that was adapted for a movie? Was this a remake of an Alfred Hitchcock production?

The entire movie takes place in a guy's apartment where the tenant, Tepper (Erik Palladino), had a wallet he found with not much in it besides a lottery ticket. The ticket was a winner, but he wouldn't find that out until after he called the owner's brother-in-law and notified him that 1.) he had the wallet and 2.) he could come pick it up from his address which he left on the VM.

Who does that? I don't mean who calls a wallet owner to notify them that it's been found; who calls and leaves their full address with a total stranger? If anything you tell them to call you back so you can drop the wallet in the mail. No one would do that in Mayberry, let alone New York City which is where he lived.

But it was clear that they were establishing Tepper as the Mary Sue--you know, the character who's morally unimpeachable. He watched out for his elderly neighbor, he returned found wallets by giving out his address, and he was set to marry his sweetheart. That's why he was so twisted out of shape by what he did next.

He was set to have a poker game with his buddies Quigley (Ryan Reynolds), Bolan (Dash Mihok), and Fish (Matthew Lillard). While playing their game Avery Philips (James Earl Jones), the wallet owner, came by to get the wallet. It should have been a simple exchange, but Avery made himself nice and cozy in Tepper's home. It was the kind of move that defied all logic, but there he was playing darts and poker with them like he was one of the gang.

Now, by this time, Tepper saw that the lottery ticket in Avery's wallet was a winner. He swiped the lottery ticket and was going to tell his friends he had a winner, except for some weird rule they had amongst themselves. Apparently, because they play poker for lotto tickets, no one is supposed to check the winning numbers until after the poker game. I guess this makes the game more exciting. Tepper, instead of just telling the guys he had a winner, decided to keep it a secret because of this dumb agreement they had with one another. He was going to play poker with the ticket he'd purchased, a loser, while hiding the one he stole, a winner.

He would've gotten away with the plan if jolly-- yet suspiciously suspicious--ol' Avery didn't enter the game. Now that Avery was in the game, and Avery knew he had a lotto ticket in his wallet, Tepper had to replace Avery's ticket with his own losing ticket which left Tepper having to play the poker game with his new winning ticket. How it all went down was just as ridiculous as it sounds. Tepper could easily have told Avery that there was no ticket in the wallet when he found it and that would've been the end of it. But, because we need to fill an hour-and-a-half and Tepper was such an upright person he was half-stepping on this move of his to steal the winning lottery ticket. It also didn't help that his "friends" seemed to be doing everything to make it harder for him to operate.

The poker game proceeds while Tepper acted like a wanted felon. I thought he was going to implode. The weight of taking a man's $6M lottery ticket was about to crush this Dudley-do-right. At one point he yelled at his old neighbor Mrs. Darmsetter (Frances Bay) which brought the whole party to a halt. You would've thought he clubbed a baby seal based upon the looks he got. Oh it was rich. The sad puppy looks from everyone was too much. The sappiness was extra thick.

Tepper, through hook and crook, won the poker game. He was going to do the right thing and return the winning ticket to Avery until Quigley smashed Avery in the head with a bottle. You see, Quigley knew Avery had the winning ticket and that Tepper was going to let him walk away with it. Quigley was determined to collect that money (another over-the-top move). For the first time all night Avery looked feeble and old. Until that time he looked like a serious, savvy detective always one step ahead. It was actually quite galling how this old overweight Black man was relaxed as he was in the home of these young, strange white guys. Once he got cracked in the head with a bottle it seemed to knock all of the savviness and keenness right out of him.

In the end Tepper did the right thing and even called his girlfriend (a woman who spilled her guts on intercom for no apparent reason and sadly walked away) and told her he loved her. It looked like all was going to be right in Tepper's world again except Avery Philips wasn't Avery Philips at all. He was Victor, Avery's brother-in-law, and he just played Tepper for the winning ticket.
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