Two and a Half Men: Why We Gave Up Women (2012)
Season 9, Episode 22
2/10
Why We Gave Up Two And A Half Men
18 April 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Walden decides to move in with Zoey, which makes Alan suffer a heart attack. He meets the ghost of Charlie who suggests that he makes some serious changes in his life.

This is the third of the season 9 episodes focusing on Charlie's absence, and easily the worst of the bunch. For starters, the first few minutes focus on Walden's family drama which I couldn't care less about. Then since Alan has suffered an injury he talks with a nasal voice the whole time, which gets very annoying. It limits Jon Cryer's acting, who usually does well with even the crummiest material. I cannot stress enough by the way how terrible his character is here. He's turned into such a caricature that even when he's suffering a heart attack he's trying to pick up a 100 dollar bill on the floor. Sure it's a little amusing, but not funny enough to excuse just how far he has fallen.

At the hospital we see Alan lying in a bed listening to everyone talking about him. Evelyn going "I already lost the good son" got a chuckle out of me. Then we hear a voice, who turns out to be Charlie. Except it's not the Charlie we remember, he's ended up in Kathy Bates' body. Okay, I respect Kathy Bates as an actor and she's been brilliant in other roles. But her performance is simply a cheap imitation of someone who embodied the character to a tee. There's a reason they call some roles irreplaceable, and that's because they truly are. I also don't like that he ended up in hell. Why is that necessary? It's already sad he's gone, this is only adding salt to the wound.

Charlie telling him to stand on his two feet and stop sponging off others had potential as an idea, but is not followed through on very well. We see him move into a cheap hotel room, trying to make the best of it. He realizes soon this is gonna be a very unpleasant experience, so Charlie tells him that she was only fúcking with him and wanted nothing more than making him move out of the house. Once again kind of doing him a disservice since he did want Alan to become more independent. Yes he did become increasingly insistent on him moving out, but that's only because Alan started overstaying his welcome.

Of course this leads to him crawling back to Walden. But instead of being honest and saying it didn't work out, he *fakes* a heart attack this time to garner false sympathy. This is taking sponginess to a level that isn't lighthearted or clever, it's actually irritatingly despicable.

I haven't mentioned Walden much. I never have much to say about him, he's the most boring character on the show. Ashton's performance doesn't help either since he seems to have lost his funnybone when joining the series. Depending on the episode he'll either play it too goofy, or he'll look stiff like he just walked into the wrong room. This is a case of the latter instance.

This is the first time I've gotten a glimpse of Zoey, and can already say I don't care much for her. Another character who's dull as dishwater, and Sophie Winkleman should change her name to Wrinkleman with that weird offputting voice she's forcing out. Please stop sounding like a posh high society lady at a cocktail party, for God's sake.

I guess now I can say I've seen this infamous anti-gem, but it sure as hell wasn't worth it.
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