No meatcleaver, no massacre. A painfully slow hour and twenty some minutes of four unlikeable 40 year old college kids doing stupid things and dying in really funny ways that were not meant to be as an act of vengeance from their professor who's family they massacred for... reasons.
Underscored by bizarre chanting that reads like something you'd find on the wall of a mental asylum's bathroom, the kids die in increasingly not subtle ways that befuddle the grand detective, from having a hood slammed repeatedly on to being inexplicably shredded in the middle of the desert.
After about an hour of puttering about, the big lad himself discovers the pattern and puts two and two together, lures the last guy into arriving at the residence under the pretense that it's a curse that's killing everyone and there must be a ' counter spell '.
His plan comes to fruition, ignoring the storytelling problems that would make you think the last guy wouldn't believe it, and his action is to lumber at the last murderer after loudly announcing his presence to the unaware man. Shockingly, the murderer kills the cop, despite his best efforts of standing there while being beat with a candle stick.
Anyway, the monster curse catches up and attacks the last guy, causing an impromptu enucleation, but not really, as it's revealed he's in a mental ward with a fake eyeball he thinks is his real eyeball despite having both in his skull still. I don't know, either.
Not worth a watch, two stars only because one of the doctors exclaimed ' this is my first nut! ' at the end.
Underscored by bizarre chanting that reads like something you'd find on the wall of a mental asylum's bathroom, the kids die in increasingly not subtle ways that befuddle the grand detective, from having a hood slammed repeatedly on to being inexplicably shredded in the middle of the desert.
After about an hour of puttering about, the big lad himself discovers the pattern and puts two and two together, lures the last guy into arriving at the residence under the pretense that it's a curse that's killing everyone and there must be a ' counter spell '.
His plan comes to fruition, ignoring the storytelling problems that would make you think the last guy wouldn't believe it, and his action is to lumber at the last murderer after loudly announcing his presence to the unaware man. Shockingly, the murderer kills the cop, despite his best efforts of standing there while being beat with a candle stick.
Anyway, the monster curse catches up and attacks the last guy, causing an impromptu enucleation, but not really, as it's revealed he's in a mental ward with a fake eyeball he thinks is his real eyeball despite having both in his skull still. I don't know, either.
Not worth a watch, two stars only because one of the doctors exclaimed ' this is my first nut! ' at the end.