The Addams Family (1991)

Dana Ivey: Margaret Alford

Photos 

Quotes 

• Margaret : [Questioning the absence of a Halloween costume]  What are you, darling? Where's your costume?

  Wednesday : This is my costume. I'm a homicidal maniac. They look just like everybody else.

• Judge : [at the auction]  This magnificent piece is encrusted with rubies and 15 emerald chips. It was donated by Morticia and Gomez... Addams. Remember, this year, over half our proceeds will benefit the elderly and the mentally disabled.

  [Gomez and Morticia look fondly at Grandmama] 

  Judge : I'll open the bidding at $5000

  Gomez : Five, hah! Not good enough. $25,000!

  Margaret : [frantic]  What are they *doing*?

  Judge : I have twenty.

  Gomez : Twenty-five!

  [to Morticia] 

  Gomez : Cara mia?

  Judge : Twenty-five.

  Morticia : Thirty.

  [to Gomez] 

  Morticia : Mon sauvage.

  Gomez : [voice cracks]  Thirty-five!

  [to Morticia] 

  Gomez : Eres divina.

  Morticia : Mm, fifty!

  Judge : I have $50,000.

  Morticia : [to Gomez]  Your turn, my ecstasy.

  Judge : Fifty thousand going once, fifty thousand going twice. Sold to Morticia Addams for fifty... thousand... dollars.

  [looks disgusted as Gomez and Morticia do something obscene off-camera] 

• Morticia : Margaret?

  Margaret : Hmm?

  Morticia : About the séance tonight, I wish you'd come. It's Gomez I'm terribly worried about. He won't eat, he can't sleep, he keeps coughing up blood.

  Margaret : He coughs up blood?

  Morticia : Well, not like he used to...

• Margaret : This is all so humiliating. Why did I marry you?

  Tully Alfford : Because I said yes.

• Margaret : You are too precious for words, why, I could just... eat you alive!

  Morticia : Oh no, Margaret! Too young!

• Margaret : Everyone keeps asking where he bought his costume.

  Gomez : It is a wonderful hat.