Smallville (TV Series)
X-Ray (2001)
Michael Rosenbaum: Lex Luthor
Photos
Quotes
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Lex Luthor : I promise I'm not a criminal mastermind.
Clark Kent : I know. A criminal mastermind would have worn a mask.
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Lex Luthor : I'd question your integrity, but you're a journalist.
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Lex Luthor : If you walk out that door, I will make you disappear.
Roger Nixon : What're you gunna do? You gunna have me killed?
Lex Luthor : [laughs] No. You'll be very much alive. But there'll be no evidence of your existence.
Roger Nixon : What are you talking about?
Lex Luthor : Driver's license, passports, social security number, bank account, will all be erased. With one call, I can be sure that there will be no record that you actually walk this earth.
Roger Nixon : You're bluffing.
Lex Luthor : Call your bank, see if your account still exists. That is, if your cell phone hasn't already been disconnected.
[Roger tries his phone but notices it's not working]
Roger Nixon : What did you do?
Lex Luthor : Don't worry, Roger. I'm going to give you a new identity. One that's a little less upstanding. Maybe a murderer. Maybe a drug dealer. Either way, you'll lose your job, your house, and your family.
Roger Nixon : Look, I'll give the money back. Then we'll be even.
Lex Luthor : No, we won't. Because I also know your brother works for juvenile court. What'd you tell him? "Steal the records and you can make some quick cash"? He could do time for that.
Roger Nixon : Leave him out of this.
Lex Luthor : I didn't get him involved, Roger. You did. You came into my life thinking you could shake me down because I was some spoiled rich brat who needed his daddy's protection. Trust me. When I make things disappear, they stay buried.
Roger Nixon : What do you want from me?
Lex Luthor : Your help. My father's obsessed with the Daily Planet. But I know the Inquisitor is read by the people. They're the ones I'm interested in. I will feed you stories and you will print them. Any negative stories about me you will kill. You'll be at my disposal 24/7.
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Rose Greer : Tina, where did you get this?
Tina Greer : Promised I'd solve all of our problems.
Rose Greer : Oh, please tell me you didn't rob the bank yesterday.
Tina Greer : I didn't.
[shape-shifting into Lex]
Lex Luthor : Lex Luthor did.
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Martha Kent : [reading about "Lex's" bank robbery in the paper] He got away with $100,000.
Clark Kent : I know Lex. It wasn't him.
Jonathan Kent : Clark, I know that he's a friend of yours, but come on, you saw him with your own eyes.
Clark Kent : I don't know what I saw.
Martha Kent : There must be some kind of reasonable explanation for this, I hope.
Lex Luthor : [outside on the patio] Me, too. I hate to think I have an evil twin.
Martha Kent : Lex, we didn't hear you pull up.
Lex Luthor : May I come in? I promise I'm not packing heat.
Clark Kent : Lex, how come you're not in jail?
Lex Luthor : Because I was hosting a reception for 200 fertilizer distributors in Metropolis at the time of the robbery.
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Jonathan Kent : Do the police have any leads?
Lex Luthor : None. That's why I wanted to talk to you, Clark. Your name was on the witness list. Did you actually see this person?
Clark Kent : Yeah. He looked just like you.
Lex Luthor : [laughing scoff] Except his fingerprints and signature didn't match mine. You sure your eyes weren't playing tricks on you?
Clark Kent : What's gonna happen now?
Lex Luthor : Well, hopefully, the money will turn up. In the meantime, the Metropolis tabloids will have a field day, and I'm sure certain people's opinions of me will be cemented in stone.
Jonathan Kent : [ignoring the jab] I gotta get to work.
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Mr. Ellis : Well, Mr. Luthor... may I see your driver's license, please?
Lex Luthor : Why?
Mr. Ellis : This signature doesn't match our records. I... I just need to verify your ID.
Lex Luthor : I'm standing right here in front of you. What more do you need?
Mr. Ellis : I'm sorry. It's bank policy.
Lex Luthor : [taking out a gun instead] I need the money now. Fill the bag!
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Roger Nixon : It's a hell of a picture, Lex. You know, it really boosted our sales.
Lex Luthor : I've read comic books with less fiction than your rag.
Roger Nixon : Well, how about this? Is this fiction? It's your juvenile record. Fascinating reading. That must have taken a Brinks truck of your dad's money to keep those people quiet.
Lex Luthor : Those records are sealed.
Roger Nixon : I'm a resourceful guy. You know, I saw that picture yesterday and it got me thinking of a follow-up. "Lex Luthor's Wild Youth in Metropolis." Does the name Club Zero ring a bell?
Lex Luthor : You print one word about that, I'll sue.
Roger Nixon : Lawsuits take years. The genie'll be out of the bottle and all the people will know that the new and improved Lex Luthor is nothing but a facade.
Lex Luthor : You know what I think, Rog? If you wanted to print that, it would already be in the paper. I think you're looking for a payoff.
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Mr. Ellis : Mr. Luthor, what can I do for you today?
Lex Luthor : I want to close all my accounts.
Mr. Ellis : May I ask why?
Lex Luthor : Is there a problem?
Mr. Ellis : No. No, no, no, of course not. It's... it's just that the Luthors have been banking here for twelve years. It's... quite a shock.
Lex Luthor : I'd like it all in cash.
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Roger Nixon : What happened to your car?
Lex Luthor : I drove it off a bridge at 60 miles an hour.
Roger Nixon : Then how are you still alive?
Lex Luthor : That's the mystery I need your help solving.
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Lex Luthor : Can I fix you a drink?
Roger Nixon : If it's all the same to you, I'd just soon get my money and get out.
Lex Luthor : Of course.
Roger Nixon : I assume I don't have to count it?
Lex Luthor : I've even supplied the bag.