Nostalgia Critic (TV Series)

Return of the Nostalgic Commercials (2011)

Mel Blanc: Barney Rubble

Quotes 

• Nostalgia Critic : [referring to a commercial for Cocoa Pebbles]  Okay, I'm sorry. I gotta address something with these commercials: here you got Barney, who's going to these EXTREME lengths to get Fred's cereal. Why doesn't he just go to the fucking store? I mean, my God! It's incredible the lengths he'll go to. I mean, his face is on the fucking box! You'd think he'd be able to get a free one every once in a while! And for that matter, why does Fred keep feeding into his habit? Why doesn't he just crack and tell him what he really needs to do?

  Fred Flintstone : Barney!

  Barney Rubble : [dressed as a rock star]  Uh-oh, this rock's got to roll!

  Nostalgia Critic : [talking like Fred]  Okay, Barney, before I chase you around in some comedic routine, I just want to ask you to do one thing: look at yourself. Just really look at yourself.

  [Barney looks sad] 

  Nostalgia Critic : I mean, my God, Barney, my God. You're a pathetic wreck. I mean...

  [gestures toward a concert stage that Barney built to plan his scam] 

  Nostalgia Critic : That stage alone. How much did that cost you? Hundreds, maybe thousands of dollars? You keep doing this every week. Week after week, you blow your money away when you could be spending time with your family! This is why you're defaulting on your mortgage, Barn. This is why Betty has to strip.

  [takes out his wallet] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Here.

  [gives Barney some money] 

  Nostalgia Critic : There's, uh, twenty dollars. That's good for a couple boxes. Go. Go to the store, get a few. Enjoy yourself. You have a problem, Barn. You have a real serious problem. And it needs to be addressed. I mean, seriously, Barn, what is it about my cereal that sets it apart from other cereals?

  Barney Rubble : 'Cause it came from your wife's box.

  Nostalgia Critic : [taking out a gun and cocking it, still as Fred]  Okay, Barn, you're going down!

  [fires the gun at Barney, who runs off while being chased by Fred] 

  Fred Flintstone : [voiceover]  Post Cocoa Pebbles cereal, part of this nutritious breakfast. Yabba-dabba-delicious!

  Nostalgia Critic : [as Fred]  I'll make you eat YOUR wife's box!