Alph-2 Reviews

The Unknown (1927)

High Weirdness from Tod Browning

[13 June 1999]

A mad and delirious melodrama that has to be one of the most entertaining of silent films, still fresh and fascinating to a modern audience.

The plot is tightly constructed and whirlwind in its pacing. Don't worry too much about its implausibility, just get on the rollercoaster and enjoy the ride !

Night of the Ghouls (1959)

A weird appeal that defies explanation!

[25 February 1999]

All the mad ingredients that make up Ed Wood's delirious world are in full force here.

A spiritualist is busy raising the dead in a haunted house, and the cops investigate in classic Wood style. Ghouls, skeletons, bizarre and protracted dialogue aplenty in this 'sequel' to Bride of The Monster, which the script constantly refers to. There's even a narration delivered from a coffin by the inimitable Criswell!

It's no use arguing the merits of any Ed Wood film. At best, they're interminably silly by any conventional standard. Yet to his many fans they radiate with a weird appeal that defies explanation. I like 'em anyway.

Dead Man Walking (1995)

Compelling and heartrending.

[25 February 1999]

A thoughtful, brave and compelling story with all the complexities of punishment, forgiveness, evil, redemption and guilt.

Unlike typical Hollywood it avoids polemics and captures a harrowing slice-of-life with many questions and no absolute answers.

Great performances all around, particularly Susan Sarandon.

Naked (1993)

Full of whingeing and fury, signifying nothing

[25 February 1999]

A pretentious load of stagey, contrived codswallop from the Whingeing Pom school of filmmaking. Full of meaningless designer angst for the chattering classes. David Thewlis's character moves through an unlikely succession of cardboard cutout ciphers written in as unbelievable sounding boards for his tedious psychobabble. Ironically this film is lauded for its realism. What a joke!

The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)

The best Bond film ever made!

[25 February 1999]

This Bond is typically slammed in movie reviews/ Bond books and is frequently numbered among the worst of the series. But it's my favourite ! I don't think Bond was ever more entertaining than in this colourful, humourous, intriguing adventure.

Christopher Lee is marvellous as Scaramanga, arch assassin and a kind of 007-gone-to-seed. He's menacing and interesting. Britt is amusing as the dippy Goodnight and Roger Moore (surely the best Bond !) is in top form - alternately witty and deadly, but always the playboy gentleman.

Just the right mixture of humour and danger, and some amazing sets, set this one apart from the pack.

Easy Rider (1969)

Tale of intolerance still relevant today

[25 February 1999]

'Easy Rider' makes the simple and valid point that the counter-culture had a lot more to fear from mainstream society than vise-versa.

However, it doesn't achieve this by glorifying the hippie ethos, showing it be ultimately a rather empty and pointless mentality.

What makes the film still relevant and moving is the poignance of a failed search for personal freedom in the supposed 'land of the free'.

Testament of Orpheus (1960)

Cocteau's transcendent sense of wonder shines brightly.

[25 February 1999]

Jean Cocteau's final filmic flight of fantasy is very special indeed.

Adopting the guise of a poet 'unstuck in time', Cocteau ranges over his life in the world of poetry. It's a phantasmorgorical whirl of imagery, with plenty of humour, pathos and an enormous, transcendent sense of wonder. There's also a trial sequence where the characters from his earlier success 'Orphee' try him for bringing them into existence !

Some of Cocteau famous friends feature in brief cameos. Look out for Picasso and Bardot.

You don't have to be a Cocteau fan to enjoy this movie. All you need is an interest in the nature of creativity and an enjoyment of poetry, symbolic art, and the wonderfully cinematic music of Georges Auric, who scored all Cocteau's major films.

Robot Monster (1953)

I must ! But I cannot !

[25 February 1999]

A corpulent alien gorilla ('Ro-Man') tries to destroy the world with his bubble-machine but is tripped up by lust for a scientist's daughter.

If that's not enough for you, consider the fact that his diabolical desires are not exactly spurned by the young hussy ! Add some insanely inappropriate stock footage inserts, perhaps the poorest model work ever, very surprising direction and editing, etc... etc... this is entertainment at its most gloriously demented.

But the crowning glory is Ro-Man's philosophical doubts which he constantly calls his boss about...'I must, but I cannot!' A soliloquy from hell if ever there was one. In a reverse kind of way, this film is perfect.

The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)

A gentle, powerful sci-fi masterpiece.

[25 February 1999]

A literate, gentle allegory of a christlike alien threatening Earth with the big stick of intergalactic judgement if we don't cease our nasty warlike ways.

In a way it's a wish-fulfilling response to the fearful power atomic weaponry suddenly delivered to the world. It's as if we wanted God's intervention to stop us immediately destroying ourselves with our disgusting new toys.

I'd certainly welcome a Second Coming from Klaatu and Gort if they could only prevent a tenth of the senseless slaughter and political oppression currently blighting the globe.

One minor niggling, quibbling doubt I have is that the flying saucer, having landed in the middle of a large city, would surely be surrounded by fascinated onlookers 24 hours a day - but the site is deserted overnight. But apart from that single (and extremely petty) implausibility, this film is a gentle, powerful sci-fi masterpiece.

Vampyr (1932)

Surrender to Vampyr's eerie, dreamlike world....

[25 February 1999]

With its fragmented plot, eerie imagery, and air of undefined menace this film more nearly realises the dream state than any other film I've seen.

The story, which follows a young man's discovery of vampiric doings while on a trip to the country, is secondary to the fascinatingly uncanny mood generated by the cinematography and effective use of sound and silence.

Yes, yes, it's old and unconventional, and requires either some extra concentration or complete surrender to its unique world, but the effort is worth it.

Vampyr should especially appeal to fans of cinefantastique, cinema history and maybe even the arthouse crowd.

Dracula (1931)

A superbly atmospheric, cobwebbed delight!

[25 February 1999]

The Transylvanian sequences in this film are a superbly atmospheric, cobwebbed delight and Lugosi's vampire has a presence unmatched by any other screen Count with the possible exception of Christopher Lee.

The theatrical origins of the screenplay (it was an adaption of a stageplay based on Stoker's novel) are more apparent in the second half. Unlike the book Dracula at first conceals his vampiric nature from his English victims, which echoes Jeckyll and Hyde somewhat.

Nevertheless I feel the spirit of the book survives in this version better than it does in closer adaptions. Along with 'Vampyr' (1932)and 'Nosferatu'(1922) - also a loose adaption of Stoker - it is probably the best vampire movie ever made.

Nosferatu (1922)

Time has not dimmed its creepy, atmospheric appeal.

[25 February 1999]

It's silent, almost 80 years old and still one of the very best horror movies in existence !

Although containing many horror motifs, since reworked into cliches, it is still fresh and exciting. It is very well paced and moves along nicely, with a steady stream of wonderful trick photography and moody black and white chills.

Max Schreck's vampire (Count Orlock in the version I saw) is an incredibly creepy performance. He plays it like a weird, ratlike malevolent spirit and thoroughly convinces.

Very entertaining, and highly recommended.

Barb Wire (1996)

Deserves Golden Turkey for 'Most Unsubtle Product Placement'

[24 February 1999]

Name the movie: Tough Cynic With A Past operates a nightclub in a city occupied by a right wing regime at war with a heroic resistance movement. Tough Cynic's Old Flame, who vanished years ago during a crisis, suddenly returns with a New Spouse bearing vital info for the resistance. Old Flame convinces Tough Cynic to help smuggle New Spouse to a safe haven.

Casablanca ? Not quite, it's Barb Wire, except Pam is Bogart and Rick's Place is Hammerhead, a heavy metal club frequented by assorted vomiting bikies and bondage types, just the spot for snarling totalitarians to drop by to admire Pam's assets. My favourite bit is when Pam contemplates her life, reclining on a motorbike before the cityscape at sunset, and after a philosophical pause, profoundly squeaks 'what a s**t-hole!' as we gently fade out.

A mostly harmless mixture of cartoonish violence and staggeringly unsubtle product placement.

Dead Man (1995)

I have come to bury this dead man, and not to praise it!

[24 February 1999]

Dead Man's atmospheric soundtrack and 'western noir' look try to drug the audience into critical insensibility by a carefully contrived 'hipness' - but there is not a shred of substance beneath the style. The only real content in this alluring but clumsy mess is vulgar, doltish sendup of the same Western movie cliches it otherwise blindly embraces.

Worse still, it's insufferably pretentious. For example, Nobody taking Blake for the famous poet. Here Jarmusch flatters a lazy audience content to admire their own sophistication in getting the 'in-joke' and consequently don't care that he is incapable of developing this gimmick into a worthwhile idea. Its main function appears to be to allow Blake to ask an assailant 'Do you know my poetry?' before blowing him away. I could easily believe the whole film was constructed around this glibly marketable sound-byte.

Dead Man is shot so full of holes that viewers can fill as they please - wishful thinking might suggest that carelessness was intended, that Nobody was magically transforming Blake for mystical reasons, that Blake was already a 'dead man' and his journey a dream or a purgatory. None of this tallies with the publicity interviews. Dead Man isn't a deliberately non-naturalistic exploration of the violence and illogicalities of civilisation - it is merely violent and illogical itself - a reflection of rather than a comment on our cultural poverty.

Maybe I've missed the point entirely - perhaps it was never meant to achieve anything beyond looking 'cool'. Dead Man might be dead on arrival, but it's left a good looking corpse, and that's good enough for a lot of people.

Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)

A fraudulent and absurd turkey

[24 February 1999]

The arrogant and pretentious publicity surrounding this film heralds it as the first true depiction of Stoker's novel. Don't believe it - they're just exploiting Stoker's reputation to sell you their own stunningly unoriginal and vastly inferior story.

Adapting from a literary source naturally requires considerable condensing of plot, characters, etc., but at the very least there should some of the book's essence remaining.

It is absurd and fraudulent to call this movie 'Bram Stoker's Dracula'. The entire plot about Dracula chasing the reincarnation of his true love is simply not in the original ! It's actually closer to the 1932 film "The Mummy". Stoker's novel has no scenes set in Vlad The Impaler's lifetime. This new film has Dracula as an anti-hero wronged by the hypocrisy of the church, which is obviously a desperate attempt to provide sympathy, and a clear motive for his evil doings.

The sense of the book is that Dracula has no motive beyond the pure evil that has possessed him - his behaviour is an end in itself, a far more horrific scenario than Coppolla'a new age revisionism. And of course conventional christianity is never presented as villainous or hypocritical by Stoker.

Despite its own considerable departures from Stoker, the 1931 Lugosi film has much more of the spirit and atmosphere of the novel. And it was based on the play, not the book. In any case didn't have the gall to attach Stoker's name to the title.

The Wicker Man (1973)

A subtle, eerie, ambivalent masterpiece

[24 February 1999]

"The Wicker Man" is a marvelous, literate gem - alternately humourous and horrifying, but always intriguing.

Its strength and horror lies in a careful ambivalence, neither supporting paganism or christianity, merely presenting them in chilling conflict. Edward Woodward's policeman shows the priggish, hypocritical intolerance of his faith, yet draws from this same faith a very real and moving strength, and so meets his ghastly fate spiritually undefeated and with dignity. The pagans' sacrifice appears cruel but is to them a vital and happy ritual with Woodward in a sense an honoured participant.

Queen of Blood (1966)

Garish, hallucenogenic creepiness.

[24 February 1999]

The alien 'Queen of blood' is the best thing about this garish little thriller, bubbling over with vampiric creepiness.

Unfortunately the first two-thirds of the running time are a bit stolid, relying heavily on time-consuming stock footage from a Russian science fiction film.

But there's a satisfying atmosphere of hallucenogenic otherworldiness, and it's obviously a major source for "Alien' (1979), which in some (but by no means all!) respects it is superior to, with a neat twist ending and an avoidance of leaps in the dark cliches.

Persona (1966)

Intriguing, surprising, nightmarish

[24 February 1999]

Actress rendered mute by her psychosis retreats to a seaside cottage with her nurse, or does she ?

Nothing is quite what it seems in this nightmarish account of fragmented personality. Antiseptic and creepy , with jolts of nasty surrealism.

Liv Ullmann's astonishingly expressive performance contains only one phrase of dialogue in an hour and a half of screen time.

Only one small complaint - the white English subtitles in the print I saw were often on a totally white background and thus invisible!

Batman: The Movie (1966)

Enormously appealing wild camp nonsense - don't miss !

[24 February 1999]

Possibly I am stark raving mad, but I think the 'shark attack' scene from this movie is one of the most hilarious moments in all cinema!

The Batman TV series was one of those rare moments when all the elements combined brilliantly - casting, writing, set design, music, acting, etc. - and this film has all the same wild camp nonsense, glorious imagination and sheer appeal.

The Angry Red Planet (1959)

Mars has every right to be angry !

[24 February 1999]

Four bloodthirsty simpletons travel to Mars (after an interminable prologue) and wreak havoc in the name of scientific exploration. The martians don't like this one bit. And who can blame them ?

Redeemed slightly by some suitably strange martians, most notably the wondrous batratspider, whose vicious treatment at the hands of a supposed scientific expedition is actually quite distressing!

An Alligator Named Daisy (1955)

A light, entertaining, good-hearted romp

[24 February 1999]

Highly amusing! Daisy the alligator steals the show, and is forever popping up when least expected. A light, entertaining, good hearted romp with Diana Dors in typical form. Perhaps my favourite film featuring an alligator even though in some scenes it's obvious the leading lady is rubber ! But this only adds to the film's appeal.

Phantom from Space (1953)

Underrated B Grade sci-fi

[24 February 1999]

A low budget sci-fi that has been undeservedly overlooked, for it achieves (within its B Grade limitations) a good deal of suspense and has a plot which veers unexpectedly into some non-formulaic territory.

'Phantom From Space' is a more thoughtful, interesting and likeable exploitation of 1950s UFO hysteria than many of its better known contemporaries.