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trianglesamurai
Reviews
The Libertine (2004)
First Movie Ever Filmed In Glorious WHISPERSOUND!!!
The only possible explanation for this movie is the invention of a new technology. Enter Whispersound! The first vocal recording device that turns every single line uttered into a barely audible whisper, no matter what the level of the volume on your TV. Don't worry about waking your roommate while you try to watch this movie late at night with your girlfriend, that's impossible. You yourself will be straining to catch even the slightest wisp of every and all bits of dialogue. Your necks may hurt from craning, your eyes main be tired from straining (this movie is also filmed in fantastic darkgrainoldfashionedsemisepiacolor!), but what a small price to pay for the chance to experience some new technology.
"I do not want you to like me." What a mis-issued quote. What it is meant to mean is that he's so totally without morals and quality of character, that you can't help but to hate him. What it really means in this movie is that he talks so quietly and with such a flare for the drab and melodramatic, that you can't help but dislike him for wasting your time.
That being said, the make-up people did a truly amazing job. Let it never be said that I didn't give credit where it was due.
Kung fu (2004)
Far and above my expectations in a lovely, lavender scented, bad teethed way.
This movie was amazing. Comedy, somewhat hackneyed effects, kung fu, tragedy, drama, love, Bhuddist Palm. I laughed, I cried, I kissed 8 bucks goodbye. The crazy thing was that I was really at the edge of my seat during a good deal of the action. And BOY did I ever laugh. The Spiderman reference was beyond value. And the butt crack! Ridiculous. I loved this movie. It was a throwback to the comedy of Sammo Hung and Yuen Biao in kung fu, only the martial arts were computer animated into absurdity, like a more visceral but less over the top beautiful House of Flying Daggers. Go see it. I beg of you. Go see this movie. Alleluia, go see this movie.
Baai ga jai (1981)
Beautiful. It made me cry.
I cried from laughter at the pair of marbles they put in Yuen's sidekick's mouth to make him look stupid. Go watch every movie you can that has both Yuen Biao and Sammo Hung, I'm going through them as quickly as I can, and I have yet to be disappointed. I particularly recommend "My Lucky Stars" and "Knockaround." In this movie they clearly pay tribute to their Peking Opera heritage (where they and Jackie Chan received their earliest training). Really, these guys made far better movies after Jackie Chan came to America to make unbridled steaming piles of "oh look, I can hurt myself!" I do realize, however, that these movies aren't for everyone. However, if you're even reading this, your interest must be great enough that you've searched out this movie on purpose, in which case, you must go get it.
Chaperone (2000)
Heh, not entirely probable, but if you can suspend disbelief for a few minutes, it's good.
This movie is a short. I've only ever seen it on HBO once, but it catches your interest immediately, and holds it until the end. The awkwardness draws you right in and leaves you smiling, but shifting yourself a little in your seat. If you get a chance to see it, watch it. Excellent, eccentric short film.
Yôjinbô (1961)
So good.
They don't make people like Akira Kurosawa in America. Nor do they make actors like Toshiro Mifune. Watch this movie and then watch "The Seven Samurai" ("Shichinin No Samurai"). They're both in black and white, and not as fast paced as today's 2fast 2forgettable garbage, but they're both far more entertaining, immersive and intense. Every moment has its purpose, every action a reaction. This is the lost art of film. Also, go watch all of Kurosawa's other movies, particularly "Rashomon", "The Hidden Fortress", and "Ran". Take a look at his movie listing and observe all the movies that were made with his scripts in other countries. Make sure you vote for "The Seven Samurai" after you watch it, those -lame by comparison- Lord of the Rings movies have been pushing it back from it's rightful place in the top 250 movies.