I saw this on the extras of The Nightmare Before Christmas DVD, along with Tim Burton's other short film, Frankenweenie. I watched Frankenweenie first and thought it was just okay. Then I watched Vincent. And I found a new entry for my list of favourite films. It is just minutes long, and contains no dialogue, just a poem given in narration by Vincent Price, but it is total brilliance. It's an animated little tale about a pretty morbid seven-year-old boy who aspires to be Vincent Price. Vincent is a darkly comic masterpiece with that Gothic feel typical of Tim Burton. If you have a few spare minutes and have the means to watch this, then do. It's a wonderful work of art. I'd buy The Nightmare Before Christmas DVD just for this short.
Reviews
17 Reviews
CatDog
(1998–2005)
Brilliant
18 July 2005
Since this show started when I was about ten, I've watched it and always very much enjoyed it. Though it does seem to have gathered a lot of bad reviews. But I do believe that a lot of people find the concept a little creepy. It's about two friends, a cat named Cat, and a dog named Dog (how imaginative) who are joined together. A cat and a dog kind of joined in the middle, so God only knows how they use the toilet. Anyway, CatDog is a very enjoyable show and I only wish it would be shown on TV more. It only seems to be on VERY occasionally, for very short runs, after it was cancelled in 2001 or around there. But should it come on, it is worth watching. It's highly amusing, and frequently funny, and yes, very odd. But look at that as a good thing, and it's a great show. And the guys doing the voices, Jim Cummings (Cat) and Tom Kenny (Dog), work very well together, and are a great team. I do believe the two of them have worked together several times. Overall, CatDog is a strange, but entertaining show (with a one of the best theme tunes) and deserves to be seen, so enjoy!
The Riddlers
(1989–1998)
Terrifying
2 July 2005
I used to watch this show when I was little, as it was one of those shows in a line of kids shows that play on kids TV after school. So in amongst the likes of Thomas the Tank Engine, Nelly the Elephant, and Postman Pat, I used to watch this little show. And I always found it really scary. Absolutely terrifying. The weird puppet things are hideous and the whole show just has a very freaky feel to it. While I can look back at Nelly the Elephant, Thomas the Tank Engine and Postman Pat and think of them warmly, The Riddlers just sends shivers down my spine when I think back of it.
Some kids may like this show, but sensitive kids, and most little kids around the ages of about three to six are sensitive, will find it pretty scary. Even know, it sometimes gets bought up in conversation, "Remember that freaky show we used to watch when we were little..." Overall, I'd say it's probably best to avoid this one. It'll give your kids nightmares.
Some kids may like this show, but sensitive kids, and most little kids around the ages of about three to six are sensitive, will find it pretty scary. Even know, it sometimes gets bought up in conversation, "Remember that freaky show we used to watch when we were little..." Overall, I'd say it's probably best to avoid this one. It'll give your kids nightmares.
Revelation
(2001)
Bad acting, deeply confusing plot, odd camera-work...
22 May 2005
As a fan of Udo Kier, if a movie of his comes on the TV, I will watch it. So I watched Revelation, and, not being biased, Udo was a actually the best thing about this movie. Which is odd when you consider that Terence Stamp is in the same movie. But I don't know what happened. Stamp is AWFUL in this movie. Maybe he just couldn't be bothered, but his acting is atrocious. His line delivery is awful! But Revelation isn't that good a movie. And maybe Stamp knew that and so didn't put the effort in.
The movie is about some box called the Loculus which has been around since the crucifixion of Christ, and Stamp's character leaves his son Jake (James D'Arcy), and his female friend, to stop the evil Grand Master (Udo Kier) from getting hold of this box.
From watching the movie, I would imagine director Stuart Urban probably hasn't had much experience as the whole movie seems a little to student-movie-esquire. The acting from everyone (bar Kier) is atrocious, and a director who can't get a good performance out of Terence Stamp is clearly crap. And there is no chemistry between James D'Arcy and whoever plays the girl at all. The only thing worth watching it for is Udo Kier, he's always been good at playing the bad guy, and the only thing remotely creepy in it are the Grand Master's dogs who move freakishly fast.
Overall, unless you are a Kier fan, watching this would be a waste of your time. And it you're a Stamp fan, STEER WELL CLEAR! You'll be completely shocked his acting could stoop so low.
The movie is about some box called the Loculus which has been around since the crucifixion of Christ, and Stamp's character leaves his son Jake (James D'Arcy), and his female friend, to stop the evil Grand Master (Udo Kier) from getting hold of this box.
From watching the movie, I would imagine director Stuart Urban probably hasn't had much experience as the whole movie seems a little to student-movie-esquire. The acting from everyone (bar Kier) is atrocious, and a director who can't get a good performance out of Terence Stamp is clearly crap. And there is no chemistry between James D'Arcy and whoever plays the girl at all. The only thing worth watching it for is Udo Kier, he's always been good at playing the bad guy, and the only thing remotely creepy in it are the Grand Master's dogs who move freakishly fast.
Overall, unless you are a Kier fan, watching this would be a waste of your time. And it you're a Stamp fan, STEER WELL CLEAR! You'll be completely shocked his acting could stoop so low.
10 Rillington Place
(1971)
Chilling, Disturbing, Creepy...But watch it anyway!
22 May 2005
10 Rillington Place is a biographical tale about serial killer John Christie who murdered seven women in his own home. Seemingly perfectly respectable to the outside world, he gives a room to hardworking, though not to bright, Timothy Evans and his wife Beryl and baby daughter Geraldine. Christie then uses his excellent wit against Evans to kill Beryl and Geraldine, and get Evans wrongfully sent to the gallows for the murders.
I find it very hard to sit through movies over 90 minutes long, but 10 Rillington Place kept me hooked all through it's 2 hour running time. It's wonderfully told and chilling all the way through. Though I had no idea what the movie was when I started watching it, and would have turned it off had John Hurt's name not been on the opening credits, I'm glad I stuck with it because it's one of the best movies I've ever seen. Though deeply disturbing, sad, and very creepy it's a movie that deserves to be watched.
It's watch-ability is helped tremendously by the performances from Richard Attenborough and John Hurt. Attenborough is worryingly convincing as the necrophiliac. He plays Christie with such subtlety that he makes the character truly terrifying and unpredictable. You can almost see all the complex and murderous plotting going on behind his eyes. And Hurt, always a very versatile actor, is terrific as Timothy Evans. His reactions to events as they unfold are so accurate and heartfelt that you really feel terrible for him and the moment he is send to the gallows is horrible.
If you come by 10 Rillington Place, whether it's on TV or you come by it on DVD or video (I don't know if it's available on DVD), you really should watch it. Though at times it is a very horrible movie to watch, it is one of those movies that truly deserves to be seen. And I can't praise Attenborough and Hurt enough for their performances. They both deserve Oscars.
I find it very hard to sit through movies over 90 minutes long, but 10 Rillington Place kept me hooked all through it's 2 hour running time. It's wonderfully told and chilling all the way through. Though I had no idea what the movie was when I started watching it, and would have turned it off had John Hurt's name not been on the opening credits, I'm glad I stuck with it because it's one of the best movies I've ever seen. Though deeply disturbing, sad, and very creepy it's a movie that deserves to be watched.
It's watch-ability is helped tremendously by the performances from Richard Attenborough and John Hurt. Attenborough is worryingly convincing as the necrophiliac. He plays Christie with such subtlety that he makes the character truly terrifying and unpredictable. You can almost see all the complex and murderous plotting going on behind his eyes. And Hurt, always a very versatile actor, is terrific as Timothy Evans. His reactions to events as they unfold are so accurate and heartfelt that you really feel terrible for him and the moment he is send to the gallows is horrible.
If you come by 10 Rillington Place, whether it's on TV or you come by it on DVD or video (I don't know if it's available on DVD), you really should watch it. Though at times it is a very horrible movie to watch, it is one of those movies that truly deserves to be seen. And I can't praise Attenborough and Hurt enough for their performances. They both deserve Oscars.
Blade
(1998)
One of the better modern-day vampire movies
9 May 2005
We've kind of been overdosed on vampire movies in recent years, most of which being total The Lost Boys rip offs, but Blade is probably the best of the new spate of vampire films. It's about a man named Blade (Wesley Snipes) who is a vampire slayer. Ironically, Blade's mother was attacked by a vampire while pregnant with him. Seeing as he was not directly attacked, he is now a half vampire; basically he is a vampire but has blood substitute to eat, and is referred to by vampires as "the daywalker." On the baddie side is Deacon Frost (Stephen Dorff) who isn't happy with all the pure-blood vampires (lead by Udo Kier)ruling the vampire kind, so takes over with his own little gang and tries to resurrect something evil known as La Magra.
Fast paced and intense, it's clear to see why it has become so popular and Wesley Snipes is fantastic in the lead, plus the leather-clad look suits him. And Dorff, as his nemeses, surprised me. Despite playing a baddie that seems like yet another David-from-The-Lost-Boys rip off, he is very good at portraying that somewhat evil yet not pantomime-esquire baddie. And he clearly loves playing the role. Of the supporting cast, Udo Kier and Donal Logue are the most entertaining; Kier (once again playing a vampire) delivering the sort of subtle evil performance he has been famed for and, in some lights, does look incredibly creepy, even though he's not really portrayed as a baddie at all, and Logue is wonderfully upbeat and frantic as one of Frost's little cronies.
If the movie does have any drawbacks, at two hours, for some people it can get tedious, and the obese vampire is absolutely hideous, but the movie is so fast paced you probably won't have time to get bored, and that hideous vampire is only in it for about two minutes, plus you can't help but sympathise with it when Karen (Blade's love interest, played by N'Bushe Wright) is pretty mean to it.
Overall, it's a very watchable movie that you will most probably enjoy.
Fast paced and intense, it's clear to see why it has become so popular and Wesley Snipes is fantastic in the lead, plus the leather-clad look suits him. And Dorff, as his nemeses, surprised me. Despite playing a baddie that seems like yet another David-from-The-Lost-Boys rip off, he is very good at portraying that somewhat evil yet not pantomime-esquire baddie. And he clearly loves playing the role. Of the supporting cast, Udo Kier and Donal Logue are the most entertaining; Kier (once again playing a vampire) delivering the sort of subtle evil performance he has been famed for and, in some lights, does look incredibly creepy, even though he's not really portrayed as a baddie at all, and Logue is wonderfully upbeat and frantic as one of Frost's little cronies.
If the movie does have any drawbacks, at two hours, for some people it can get tedious, and the obese vampire is absolutely hideous, but the movie is so fast paced you probably won't have time to get bored, and that hideous vampire is only in it for about two minutes, plus you can't help but sympathise with it when Karen (Blade's love interest, played by N'Bushe Wright) is pretty mean to it.
Overall, it's a very watchable movie that you will most probably enjoy.
The Suite Life of Zack & Cody
(2005–2008)
Actually pretty good
8 May 2005
When I watched this, I was expecting it to be pretty crap. The Sprouse twins lately seem to be Olsen twin wannabes (clothes line, TV show, plot less crappy movies), and for that reason I thought this would be as bad as an Olsen project. But no, The Suite Life is actually pretty entertaining. Judging by only one episode, it has a lot of potential and, if they effort is put in, could become a great show. Once again, because I expected this to be like an Olsen adventure, I wasn't expecting an awful lot from the two leads, Cole and Dylan Sprouse, but they surprised me. They work off each other very well, are great to watch, and have loads of screen energy. And their acting surpasses what I expected from them. The Suite Life definitely has what it takes to liven up Disney, and if nothing else, it's a fun way to pass half an hour. The potential is there, but really it could go either way. With any luck, it will succeed.
The Apartment
(1960)
A movie that deserves the term "classic"
8 May 2005
I don't normally watch old movies, let alone black and white ones, but The Apartment was well worth watching.
It tells the story of C.C. "Bud" Baxter, a struggling clerk in a New York insurance company which has A lot of employees. So to climb the corporate ladder, he decides to lend his apartment to his superiors as a place for them to take their "women on the side." Promised by his boss not to be forgotten when it comes to shifts in personnel, Bud allows his superiors to be entertaining their mistresses in his apartment, until he finds out that the mistress of the company's boss, and his recent flame, Fran, are the same person! Jack Lemmon, in the lead, is absolutely brilliant and wonderfully entertaining and sympathetic to watch, it was a shame when I decided to look him up and found out he died a few years back. He shines here and makes the movie the gem it is. The Apartment is really worth watching, so if you get the opportunity to, do so.
It tells the story of C.C. "Bud" Baxter, a struggling clerk in a New York insurance company which has A lot of employees. So to climb the corporate ladder, he decides to lend his apartment to his superiors as a place for them to take their "women on the side." Promised by his boss not to be forgotten when it comes to shifts in personnel, Bud allows his superiors to be entertaining their mistresses in his apartment, until he finds out that the mistress of the company's boss, and his recent flame, Fran, are the same person! Jack Lemmon, in the lead, is absolutely brilliant and wonderfully entertaining and sympathetic to watch, it was a shame when I decided to look him up and found out he died a few years back. He shines here and makes the movie the gem it is. The Apartment is really worth watching, so if you get the opportunity to, do so.
Pretend You Don't See Her
(2002 TV Movie)
Movie Featuring The Worlds Worst Actors
8 February 2005
As it happens, Pretend You Don't See Her is on the TV right now. However, I had to turn it off and I've come straight on to the IMDb to write this review for it.
Pretend You Don't See her, in the right hands, could have been very good. It's about a woman who is the only witness to a murder, and is then hunted by the killer. In the right hands it could have been good. This was crap though.
It has a very amateur feel to it, and is very obviously a TV movie, a very bad one. The thing that makes it so totally unwatchable? The acting is atrocious. Seriously, it is so bad. Emma Samms, in the lead, is awful, and though at times she is very good, most of the time her line delivery is dreadful.
And I've noticed on a lot of the reviews, people are praising Dani Bouffard's performance, the little girl who played the daughter. Well, reading around, it seems Bouffard has a stage mum, so my only explanation for her good reviews is that maybe her mum got all her friends to say nice things, because in reality, Bouffard's acting is the worst I've ever seen. Child actors are never expected to be that good, but Bouffard is by far the worst. If she wants TV work, she should do commercials were all she's got to do is smile and sat nothing. I mean, who gets shot and smiles as they lay on the ground unconscious? And in the scene that follows her acting is seriously a commercial for how not to act. It is atrocious.
In all, Pretend You Don't See Her is watchable if you aren't put off by things such as the worlds' worst child actor, but if you are the sort of person who notices the bad in movies as well as the good, you will seriously want to steer clear of this one, because they somehow seemed to have rounded up the cream of bad actors, not a single cast member seems to have gone into any depth with their character.
Also, if you are an actor, I beg you not to watch this. You really don't want this sort of acting to rub off on you.
Pretend You Don't See her, in the right hands, could have been very good. It's about a woman who is the only witness to a murder, and is then hunted by the killer. In the right hands it could have been good. This was crap though.
It has a very amateur feel to it, and is very obviously a TV movie, a very bad one. The thing that makes it so totally unwatchable? The acting is atrocious. Seriously, it is so bad. Emma Samms, in the lead, is awful, and though at times she is very good, most of the time her line delivery is dreadful.
And I've noticed on a lot of the reviews, people are praising Dani Bouffard's performance, the little girl who played the daughter. Well, reading around, it seems Bouffard has a stage mum, so my only explanation for her good reviews is that maybe her mum got all her friends to say nice things, because in reality, Bouffard's acting is the worst I've ever seen. Child actors are never expected to be that good, but Bouffard is by far the worst. If she wants TV work, she should do commercials were all she's got to do is smile and sat nothing. I mean, who gets shot and smiles as they lay on the ground unconscious? And in the scene that follows her acting is seriously a commercial for how not to act. It is atrocious.
In all, Pretend You Don't See Her is watchable if you aren't put off by things such as the worlds' worst child actor, but if you are the sort of person who notices the bad in movies as well as the good, you will seriously want to steer clear of this one, because they somehow seemed to have rounded up the cream of bad actors, not a single cast member seems to have gone into any depth with their character.
Also, if you are an actor, I beg you not to watch this. You really don't want this sort of acting to rub off on you.
The First Wives Club
(1996)
This One's For The Girls
4 February 2005
In this girl power movie, Goldie Hawn, Bette Midler and Diane Keaton give great performances as three middle aged who woman seek revenge on their husbands after being traded in for younger models.
With that "girls rule!" vibe, three of Hollywood's greatest leading ladies, and some truly hilarious moments, The First Wives Club is definitely one for the girls. It's thoroughly entertaining and I'm sure every female in the world can relate to it in one way or another.
Seeing as it's truly a girls feel good movie, it probably won't amuse men at all, in fact, they may even find it offensive, but grab a load of your girls friends and watch it for a good laugh on a girls night in.
With that "girls rule!" vibe, three of Hollywood's greatest leading ladies, and some truly hilarious moments, The First Wives Club is definitely one for the girls. It's thoroughly entertaining and I'm sure every female in the world can relate to it in one way or another.
Seeing as it's truly a girls feel good movie, it probably won't amuse men at all, in fact, they may even find it offensive, but grab a load of your girls friends and watch it for a good laugh on a girls night in.
The Patriot
(2000)
Entertaining War Movie
4 February 2005
The Patriot is set during the war of Independence and is about a man seeking revenge for his son, who was killed by a sadistic British soldier.
Benjamin Martin (Mel Gibson) is a peaceful farmer raising seven kids alone, as his wife has died. His eldest son, Gabriel (Heath Ledger) immediately signs up to go to war, however, he is later captured by Colonal William Tavington (Jason Isaacs), a British soldier notorious for his brutal tactics and sentenced to hang. When Benjamin's second eldest son, Thomas (Gregory Smith) goes to help his brother, he is shot down and killed by Tavington in cold blood.Taking his younger children to live with their aunt (Joely Richardson), Benjamin sets out to avenge his sons death.
The Patriot is a very entertaining movie and unlike most war movies, doesn't last for about four hours. It runs just over two hours. Mel Gibson as always, is very watchable as he is blessed with a lot of screen presence and electricity on screen. Jason Isaacs captures Tavington's cold heart perfectly and is enjoyable to watch. However, the scene stealer is the young actress who plays Benjamin's youngest daughter Susan, Skye McCole Bartusiak. Just eight years old at the time of filming, she has delivered a performance that could put to shame some of the greats. The depth and emotion she brings to her character is unbelievable and their is one scene involving her that will have you crying your eyes out.
If you're an American, you will particularly enjoy it as it is very patriotic (as the title may suggest), but even so, it is a very enjoyable movie.
Benjamin Martin (Mel Gibson) is a peaceful farmer raising seven kids alone, as his wife has died. His eldest son, Gabriel (Heath Ledger) immediately signs up to go to war, however, he is later captured by Colonal William Tavington (Jason Isaacs), a British soldier notorious for his brutal tactics and sentenced to hang. When Benjamin's second eldest son, Thomas (Gregory Smith) goes to help his brother, he is shot down and killed by Tavington in cold blood.Taking his younger children to live with their aunt (Joely Richardson), Benjamin sets out to avenge his sons death.
The Patriot is a very entertaining movie and unlike most war movies, doesn't last for about four hours. It runs just over two hours. Mel Gibson as always, is very watchable as he is blessed with a lot of screen presence and electricity on screen. Jason Isaacs captures Tavington's cold heart perfectly and is enjoyable to watch. However, the scene stealer is the young actress who plays Benjamin's youngest daughter Susan, Skye McCole Bartusiak. Just eight years old at the time of filming, she has delivered a performance that could put to shame some of the greats. The depth and emotion she brings to her character is unbelievable and their is one scene involving her that will have you crying your eyes out.
If you're an American, you will particularly enjoy it as it is very patriotic (as the title may suggest), but even so, it is a very enjoyable movie.
The Challenge
(2003)
One of the more watchable Olsen movies
3 February 2005
As far as Olsen movies go, this one is pretty good. It has a plot, and is actually watchable. Mary-Kate and Ashley have always been bad actors, and they haven't improved at all here, and once again they are practically playing themselves, but this is just a straight to video release and in that respect, it's just decent. And whereas most Olsen movies are basically an archive of them having fun, I think there was only ONE Olsens-having-fun moment in here.
To be critical, the acting is crap, the love interests aren't at all cute, and some of the supporting cast are pretty annoying, especially the girl who plays to win. It's a good movie for the Olsens, but it is unfortunately let down by a "twist" ending which is totally crap, ridiculous, and completely big headed on the Olsens part. Fortunatly, this marked the end of the Olsens' run of videos, and thats probably why they set out to try and make it half decent.
To praise the movie, it is watchable, and it's one of the Olsen movies where they don't come across as annoying (at least they aren't annoying, until the, as Mary-Kate called it, "cool surprise"). That cool surprise isn't cool at all. It's pretty big headed.
Ultimately, it's worth a look in.
To be critical, the acting is crap, the love interests aren't at all cute, and some of the supporting cast are pretty annoying, especially the girl who plays to win. It's a good movie for the Olsens, but it is unfortunately let down by a "twist" ending which is totally crap, ridiculous, and completely big headed on the Olsens part. Fortunatly, this marked the end of the Olsens' run of videos, and thats probably why they set out to try and make it half decent.
To praise the movie, it is watchable, and it's one of the Olsen movies where they don't come across as annoying (at least they aren't annoying, until the, as Mary-Kate called it, "cool surprise"). That cool surprise isn't cool at all. It's pretty big headed.
Ultimately, it's worth a look in.
Holiday in the Sun
(2001 Video)
Well, it IS an Olsen movie. What did you expect?
3 February 2005
Warning: Spoilers
Once again, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen movie star in a movie in which they are playing themselves. The plot taken from their official site? "Mary-Kate and Ashley are spending Winter Break at the lavish Atlantis, Paradise Island resort in The Bahamas. Their parents bring them along, but that means they have to miss their school trip to Hawaii with all their friends.
Determined to make the best of the situation, the girls decide there's only one thing to do: Unleash a tropical hurricane of off-the-hook action and head-over-heels tropical romance! But, amid the yachts, private jets, wave runners, scuba diving, motor scooters, horseback riding and moonlit strolls, Mary-Kate and Ashley stumble across an antiquities smuggling ring! Mary-Kate and Ashley discover the time of their lives on their... HOLIDAY IN THE SUN." Lets take a look at this...
Note how it says "Mary-Kate and Ashley..." not "Madison and Alex" which is their character names. Once again, the Olsens play the only character they've ever played (and they STILL play it badly): themselves.
The rest of the plot is basically telling you in lesser words how stupid, ridiculous, silly, irritating, and unrealistic the movies is. After all: "Mary-Kate and Ashley are spending Winter Break at the lavish Atlantis, Paradise Island resort in The Bahamas. Their parents bring them along, but that means they have to miss their school trip to Hawaii with all their friends." Thew movie starts with thee twins complaining that they have to go to the Bahamas because they wanted to go to Hawaii instead. Of course, they do go to the Bahamas - on a private jet and in a limo.
"Determined to make the best of the situation, the girls decide there's only one thing to do: Unleash a tropical hurricane of off-the-hook action and head-over-heels tropical romance!" And unleash a hurricane they do. They sneak out, go to parties til way past curfew, get arrested, and still their parents treat them like little angels. Wouldn't a normal parent introduce a little thing called discipline? And yes, once again the Olsen's' spend another movie running around and kissing boys who are about ten years older than them.
"But, amid the yachts, private jets, wave runners, scuba diving, motor scooters, horseback riding and moonlit strolls, Mary-Kate and Ashley stumble across an antiquities smuggling ring! Mary-Kate and Ashley discover the time of their lives on their... HOLIDAY IN THE SUN." Yep, once again the Olsens' spend another movie basically making a video memoir of the time they went water skiing, or swimming with dolphins, or going shopping. And this smuggling plot? Also ridiculous. From the moment they see an old man who has done nothing more than talk to one of their friends, they immediately label him as suspicious. And then comes the hilarious part. Hilerious because it's so stupid. The Olsens' chase this old man. And this guy is about 70 yet they can't keep up with him, and then this old guy does this slow-motion leap over a wall that's only about a foot high. And this is all supposed to be dramatic. The screen time of this smuggling ring? About two minutes.
And the ending cuts to the the Olsens' playing themselves for real, and they come across as REALLY big headed.
Thrown into this already completely stupid movie, is a "cute" kid who is annoying, a mum who you just want to slap.
Unless you have a death wish, or you're planning a vacation to the Bahamas and want to see the scenery, don't watch this movie. There are plenty of better ways you could spend 90 minutes.
Determined to make the best of the situation, the girls decide there's only one thing to do: Unleash a tropical hurricane of off-the-hook action and head-over-heels tropical romance! But, amid the yachts, private jets, wave runners, scuba diving, motor scooters, horseback riding and moonlit strolls, Mary-Kate and Ashley stumble across an antiquities smuggling ring! Mary-Kate and Ashley discover the time of their lives on their... HOLIDAY IN THE SUN." Lets take a look at this...
Note how it says "Mary-Kate and Ashley..." not "Madison and Alex" which is their character names. Once again, the Olsens play the only character they've ever played (and they STILL play it badly): themselves.
The rest of the plot is basically telling you in lesser words how stupid, ridiculous, silly, irritating, and unrealistic the movies is. After all: "Mary-Kate and Ashley are spending Winter Break at the lavish Atlantis, Paradise Island resort in The Bahamas. Their parents bring them along, but that means they have to miss their school trip to Hawaii with all their friends." Thew movie starts with thee twins complaining that they have to go to the Bahamas because they wanted to go to Hawaii instead. Of course, they do go to the Bahamas - on a private jet and in a limo.
"Determined to make the best of the situation, the girls decide there's only one thing to do: Unleash a tropical hurricane of off-the-hook action and head-over-heels tropical romance!" And unleash a hurricane they do. They sneak out, go to parties til way past curfew, get arrested, and still their parents treat them like little angels. Wouldn't a normal parent introduce a little thing called discipline? And yes, once again the Olsen's' spend another movie running around and kissing boys who are about ten years older than them.
"But, amid the yachts, private jets, wave runners, scuba diving, motor scooters, horseback riding and moonlit strolls, Mary-Kate and Ashley stumble across an antiquities smuggling ring! Mary-Kate and Ashley discover the time of their lives on their... HOLIDAY IN THE SUN." Yep, once again the Olsens' spend another movie basically making a video memoir of the time they went water skiing, or swimming with dolphins, or going shopping. And this smuggling plot? Also ridiculous. From the moment they see an old man who has done nothing more than talk to one of their friends, they immediately label him as suspicious. And then comes the hilarious part. Hilerious because it's so stupid. The Olsens' chase this old man. And this guy is about 70 yet they can't keep up with him, and then this old guy does this slow-motion leap over a wall that's only about a foot high. And this is all supposed to be dramatic. The screen time of this smuggling ring? About two minutes.
And the ending cuts to the the Olsens' playing themselves for real, and they come across as REALLY big headed.
Thrown into this already completely stupid movie, is a "cute" kid who is annoying, a mum who you just want to slap.
Unless you have a death wish, or you're planning a vacation to the Bahamas and want to see the scenery, don't watch this movie. There are plenty of better ways you could spend 90 minutes.
Getting There
(2002 Video)
Steer Well Clear!
3 February 2005
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen have been acting since they were nine months old. And you'd think that after over a decade, they might improved over the years, as most actors do. However, they are notorious for their atrocious acting skills, and awful movies. And as Olsen movies go, this one is by far the worst.
Getting There is about a girl named Taylor (Ashley Olsen) who wants to go to the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. She could have gone alone, but no, she brings along her twin sister Kylie (Mary-Kate Olsen, after all, since when have the Olsens' done a movie without the other?), and a bunch of friends.
Along the way they get into a load of "hilerious" mix ups as every attempt they make to get there fails. So it's basically a movie about these teens trying to find a way of "getting there".
The movie is directed by Steve Purcell who, judging by this movie and his other works, must be the worst director in the world. Second to Ed Wood, though at least Ed Wood was actually entertaining.
The camera shots are awful, the lighting is terrible, the acting is atrocious, and the plot is wafer thin. The dialogue is supposed to be funny but the ultra-crap catchphrases are cringe worthy. One word that gets really annoying? "Hype" They all say it like it's a really cool word, you watch in and think "OMG, these kids are SAD!" Ashley Olsen, as always, can be caught acting the entire time and must be the worlds most unnatural actress. Mary-Kate Olsen does her trademark complete overact, with an expression for every word and hands going everywhere. Billy Aaron Brown, as one of their friends, is just annoying, and the other cast are also just pretty irritating to watch.
The one good thing about this movie? Actress Alexandra Picatto who plays Charley Simms, a girl the twins and their friends meet on their journey. Picatto is the one actress who actually deserves to be doing something better. She's natural in front of the camera, has screen presence, and can act. However, she may only have seemed good in contrast to the rest of the cast.
You'll lose the will to live watching this movie. The best advice I can give you is to save yourself and steer clear!
Getting There is about a girl named Taylor (Ashley Olsen) who wants to go to the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. She could have gone alone, but no, she brings along her twin sister Kylie (Mary-Kate Olsen, after all, since when have the Olsens' done a movie without the other?), and a bunch of friends.
Along the way they get into a load of "hilerious" mix ups as every attempt they make to get there fails. So it's basically a movie about these teens trying to find a way of "getting there".
The movie is directed by Steve Purcell who, judging by this movie and his other works, must be the worst director in the world. Second to Ed Wood, though at least Ed Wood was actually entertaining.
The camera shots are awful, the lighting is terrible, the acting is atrocious, and the plot is wafer thin. The dialogue is supposed to be funny but the ultra-crap catchphrases are cringe worthy. One word that gets really annoying? "Hype" They all say it like it's a really cool word, you watch in and think "OMG, these kids are SAD!" Ashley Olsen, as always, can be caught acting the entire time and must be the worlds most unnatural actress. Mary-Kate Olsen does her trademark complete overact, with an expression for every word and hands going everywhere. Billy Aaron Brown, as one of their friends, is just annoying, and the other cast are also just pretty irritating to watch.
The one good thing about this movie? Actress Alexandra Picatto who plays Charley Simms, a girl the twins and their friends meet on their journey. Picatto is the one actress who actually deserves to be doing something better. She's natural in front of the camera, has screen presence, and can act. However, she may only have seemed good in contrast to the rest of the cast.
You'll lose the will to live watching this movie. The best advice I can give you is to save yourself and steer clear!
Two of a Kind
(1998–1999)
The one decent thing the Olsens' did- and it gets cancelled!
1 February 2005
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen formed Dualstar entertainment group when they were six-years-old. Now 18, they have not churned out a single good project. Save one thing: Two Of A Kind. Two Of A Kind is about 12-year-old twins called Mary-Kate (Mary-Kate Olsen) and Ashley (Ashley Olsen) (how imaginative) who are raised by their dad, Kevin (Christopher Sieber) after their mother dies. Mary-Kate is a tomboy who spends most of her time playing sports and hanging with the guys. Ashley is a prim and proper girlie girl more interested in what's in Vogue, and dating boys. Their dad, Kevin, is a college professor who hires one of his students, Carrie (Sally Wheeler), to take care of the twins whilst he's not there. Produced by the Olsens', this was meant to be a starring vehicle for them, however, the show really belongs to Christopher Sieber and Sally Wheeler. They have fantastic on screen chemistry and get all the funniest lines and are much more entertaining to watch then the twins who the show is meant to be about. This being the only decent thing to come from Dualstar and Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, it was cancelled after only one season. However, if only to watch the brilliant Christopher Sieber and Sally Wheeler, catch some of the re runs. Two Of A Kind is a funny and entertaining show.
Gormenghast
(2000)
Excellent
30 January 2005
Should this come on TV again, or if you happen to come across the DVD, I strongly urge you to watch it. This mini series is possibly the best made-for-TV production in decades. It has an amazing cast of British greats including Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Christopher Lee, Richard Griffiths, Fiona Shaw, Zoë Wanamaker, Lynsey Baxter and Stephan Fry, but don't think you should watch it just for it's star power. Had it been made with a cast of unknowns, it still would have been fantastic. Gormenghast is brilliant, it's plot is strange, twisted and dark and comes from a mind of great imagination. Originally a novel by Mervyn Peake, it has been conveyed perfectly to the screen. This is a series that is 100% deserving of a look in.
Body Count
(1998)
Actually, pretty good
28 January 2005
Body Count is about a group of guys who attempt to rob an art gallery, but their plan backfires and one of their gang winds up with a broken neck. It stars the likes of David Caruso (better known for his TV roles in CSI: Miami and NYPD Blue), John Leguizamo (Romeo & Juliet, Moulin Rouge) and Forrest Whitaker (Panic Room, Phone Booth). It has a very unoriginal plot, is obviously heavily influenced by Reservoir Dogs (which is so great, that you wonder why people would even bother try to copy it), and the fact that it stars David Caruso who is notorious for his failure with trying to do decent movies, indicate that it is NOT very good. However, despite it unoriginality and choice of lead, Body Count is deserving of a look in. It has garnered a lot of bad reviews, but it is actually rather entertaining. I came across it when it came on the TV one time. At first I thought it was an episode of CSI: Miami, but it soon became apparent that it wasn't when who I thought was Horatio started attacking people. Upon realising it was in fact a movie and not an episode of CSI, I did watch it all the way through and though "Reservoir Dogs rip off" did enter my mind, the movie was entertaining and watchable. Don't bother buy it, but if you see it on video at a friends house, or it comes on the TV sometime, do sit down and watch it. It is pretty good.
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