2/10
Box Office Poison
30 October 2017
If you love Katharine Hepburn and can't imagine how she got her nickname "box office poison", you obviously have never seen Mary of Scotland. Do yourself a favor and keep it that way.

In this biopic of Mary Stuart, Queen of Scotland, she's surrounded by those opposing her rise to the throne, including Florence Eldridge as Queen Elizabeth, Ian Keith as her power-hungry half-brother, and Douglas Walton as her effeminate suitor. Not completely alone, Kate has a few allies: Donald Crisp as a loyal Scottish citizen, John Carradine as her secretary, and Fredric March as the love of her life. I'm not well-versed on any of the details, so I don't know how historically accurate Dudley Nichols's script was, but as an audience member, this movie was atrocious. Fredric March was supposed to play someone so incredibly Scottish, he's never seen in anything besides a kilt, but since he's the same actor who notoriously mispronounced his nemesis's name in Les Miserables, could he really have been expected to speak in a Scottish accent? I wasn't the only one who found Fred's lack of accent comedic; Nathaniel Shilkret's music made it clear he thought he was scoring a funny film rather than a dramatic period piece.

Kate's portrayal of Mary—and Nichols's screenplay—makes her seem like perhaps the most incompetent queen in cinematic history. Donald Crisp dares to stand up to her in one scene, criticizing her for letting herself become a woman instead of a queen, and I completely agree with him. Time and time again she's given the ultimatum of keeping either her throne or her true love, and she's unable to decide. She claims to not care about the crown, but she won't sacrifice it to run away with Freddy? She's weak, unlikable, and annoying. Trust me, you don't need to watch this movie.
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