Friday the 13th (2009) User Reviews

Booze, Boobs and Bongs

[Simon_Says_Movies · 6/10 · 27 February 2009]

"Jason was my son, and today is his birthday…" Twelve birthdays have passed for the masked killer Jason Voorhees since the series was born thirty years ago back in the golden age of slasher films. Of the slew of terms studios use to avoid the word 'remake' I suppose the best term to describe the latest 13th film would be rejuvenation. The series started its downward spiral after part IV and while director Marcus Nipsel's doesn't wipe the slate clean, he ads enough pizazz to make it the best of the series in nearly two decades.

To give credit where it is due, this film does a number of things with the Jason character that are certainly a relief. Nipsel has opted to do away with the supernatural element and the super-zombie- Jason angle as well as giving Jason some spunk and cunning that he left with him at the bottom of Crystal Lake before part VI. Along with discarding these cumbersome characteristics, Jason is graced with a hunter/gatherer mentality that has him setting snares, traps and siphoning gasoline from locals. This is what the character should be; a loner forced to fend for himself in the forest; disturbed and deadly.

From the get go I thought this movie was a disaster. Never before had I seen poorer character development or less tense of a build- up. But don't leave the theatre so soon, as the opening act is graced with a nifty twist that you will not see coming. The calibre of the acting has never been a prominent staple of the Friday films, but this latest offering certainly comes closest to what could be considered as such. The dialogue is acceptable, only occasionally displaying the wince factor, and the leads are likable enough that you care just enough that you don't wish for a machete to the skull.

Years have passed since young Jason drowned at Camp Crystal lake, and the rein of Pamela Voorhees (Nana Visitor in a cameo) has been cut short…pun intended. Returning to the town of terror, much to the chagrin of the sheriff is Clay Miller (Jared Padalecki) who longs to find his sister (Amanda Righetti) who disappeared along with her friends a month prior. Clay's journey intertwines with a group of friends venturing to a cabin for a weekend of booze, boobs and bongs including Jenna (Danielle Panabaker), the cabins snooty owner, Trent (Travis Van Winkle) the resident stoner, Chewie (Not to be confused with Chewbacca, Aaron Yoo) among others. Their story lines are forced closer together still as people go missing, and soon the terrifying force from the nearby abandoned camp is revealed.

Aside from the Jason overhaul, who can run, jump and kill with the best of them, I enjoyed how the director managed to make the characters do stupid things, without making the characters themselves seem equally idiotic. The way the story unfolds, it is only the frantic ramblings of a few characters that claim a threat, which allows the others to wander to their bloody demises. There are still all the trademark Friday elements; a lot of booze, a lot of pot and a lot of nudity (which is overdone at times) When Jason first rears his ugly head, he has not yet donned his hockey mask, and I was interested to see if they could have him happen across it in an uncontrived manner; I was pleased if not blown away.

Fans of the series should at least be content with the latest offering, but really there is nothing new enough to become ecstatic about. One death aside, it is predictable, and the gore and deaths are less inventive then the early films. There are moments of tension to be certain, and the climax, like all Friday films, does not fail to disappoint. Disposable, but nothing special, when Jason does return I am hoping for a full overhaul of the horror icon that will not be as unlucky as its title implies.

6.5 / 10.0

Read all my reviews at: http://www.simonsaysmovies.blogspot.com

Here we go again

[simoncoram-06766 · 5/10 · 13 March 2022]

Yet another remake, with an ending that leaves scope for another remake. Kane 'Jason Vorhees' Hodder isn't in it, maybe because he read the script. Also, possibly the lamest dialogue ever.

A couple go into an old shack - she says 'maybe a homeless guy lives here.' They go into a bathroom with a string of fairy lights all lit up - he says 'someone's been here recently.' A guy rides his motorbike out to a secluded cabin. A girl asks him 'does it run'?

I liked the original series. Yes they were nothing intellectual, but they were good escapism. With all the novels, short stories, graphic stories out there they have to keep doing remakes? I don't get it.

Little Substance, Weak Style, But Great Entertainment

[gavin6942 · 6/10 · 14 February 2009]

A group of young adults, some in search of the elusive illegal herb, stumbles upon Camp Crystal Lake, where a legend tells of a boy who grew up to be a killer. A few weeks later, another group enters that same woods. The body count begins to climb... is Jason back, and if so, can he be stopped? Let me make a confession: I really didn't want to like this movie. I loved the original series of films, I don't like remakes for the most part, and with Michael Bay's name attached, I knew it was going to be an action-packed film done in ADHD-ready music video format. Sadly, I wasn't wrong about the last part. However, the film as a whole isn't that bad.

The Jason mythology is still here. His mother is still involved, there's still a hockey mask, and it all makes sense. I'm a little unclear as to why he has a home at Camp Crystal Lake (he has a permanent bed at a summer camp), but that's fine. We even have the brother off to find his little sister scenario, which hasn't been in the series since the 1980s... well done bringing back a one-dimensional character. Crazy Ralph isn't here, but an old woman does a weak job replacing him, which is better than nothing.

If you're looking for sex, drugs and rock and roll, this film has it. Plenty of topless girl screen time (thanks, Willa Ford), although you should be warned that the two most attractive women (Whitney and Jenna) don't get naked. Sorry. Marijuana plants and bongs are around, as is the Pabst Blue Ribbon. Some might say "if you only have PBR, you're out of beer" but I disagree. As for the rock... they had Night Ranger's "Sister Christian". What more do you want? The theater audience I went with enjoyed singing along.

Many good one-liner jokes, and the gore here is decent. I'm not going to say it's the best gore I've ever seen, but there's no shortage of bodies getting impaled, hacked up, shot with arrows... another reviewer summed this film up as "killing spree", and that couldn't be more true. There was almost no plot to speak of (this is the film's downfall), but how could there be when characters were getting killed off every five minutes? Derek Mears is a fine Jason. There is a better one -- Kane Hodder -- but Mears' version, where Jason looks like Darkman, is respectable. Despite all my misgivings about this film, it turned out to be alright. Not my favorite in the series, not by a long shot. But if you're into beautiful young people drinking, having sex and dying in bloody ways, this film should meet your criteria for quality. Next on the list, the "Last House on the Left" remake... if there's one film I think should have been left alone, that's it. But if they do as well as Marcus Nispel (a great guy, and director of one of the better "Frankenstein" incarnations) did on this one, it has a chance.

The Texas Chainsaw massacre Remake... Or was it Friday the 13th?

[tennwo02 · 3/10 · 14 February 2009]

Did you know a horror franchise drowned a day before this week? The Producer and Directer weren't paying any attention... They were counting their money while that cult icon drowned. It's name was Friday the 13th. I watching the night it happened. Losing my temper... there. I was a fan. Friday the 13th should have been awesome. Every minute! It was... It wasn't a very good remake. We can give up now... fans.

You see Friday the 13th was my favorite movie... and today it was raped.

I mistakingly had high expectations of this movie. Of course I was bothered by the fact that Marcus Nispel, who did such a smash up job on Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake, was directing. In fact besides the fact that Jason wore a hockey mask, had an affinity for machetes and his mother was in it for five seconds. It was almost impossible to differentiate between the two movies. Lots of slack jawed yokels and shaky camera action in the dark, just like Chainsaw. Poor story telling with numerous loose ends, just like Chainsaw. Terrible adaptation, just like Chainsaw.

Okay, maybe I'm being a little too hard on the movie. The first few minutes of the movie were incredible. Of coarse there' no rhyme or reason to Jason's return from the grave, but they never had on in the original either. The elements that they took from the first four movies were there, and yes I said 'Four' movies. There were elements from the Final Chapter despite what the propaganda says. The acting wasn't terrible. Yoo's character was probably the funniest character to ever be in a Friday the 13th to date. The under the dock kill was so classic that it felt like it belonged and it was good to see Jason in his old sack mask again.

Many key elements were there, but only for a second or two. Mrs. Voorhees head wasn't really elaborated on and wouldn't be caught as significant to anyone who hadn't seen the original movies. Despite all the hype about how Jason gets his hockey mask in this movie, it was a big let down and just seemed a little too convenient. The locals in the town were basically rejects from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. In fact the scenery may have appeared New Englandish... but the locals just screamed, "I'm from Texas!"

Jason Voorhees. How could they screw up a character like Jason Voorhees? Give these folks a hand though. They did it. I started to realize that Jason wasn't quite himself around the sleeping bag death scene. First and foremost Jason is a killer, not a sadistic torturer. Sure he's done some pretty brutal things to his victims, but roasting a person alive, just isn't his style. It's too much set up for Jason honestly. Additionally, if Jason has you on the ground with a machete coming down at you, you are DEAD. He doesn't lock you in his basement and keep you alive for months because you're a pretty girl who looks like his mother. Jason kills. And he especially kills if you impersonate his mother.

The end... in more ways than one. When I watched the ending of this movie I literally had the feeling that I was ripped off. The pay off with the wood chipper wasn't even utilized here. And then for some reason the survivor(s), another thing that was lame, decided to dump his body in the lake. This means they had to actively decide it was a good idea to get rid of the evidence that they were not the manics that killed a bunch of people, but it also means that they had to take Jason out of the chipper, take the chain off his neck, remove his mask, and carry him all the way out to the dock. And if Jason was playing possum the entire time, why didn't he just kill them when he still had access to a wood chipper and a barn full of tools?

In fact this movie raised nothing but questions. Who killed Mrs. Voorhees? What ever happened to her? Why did Jason miraculously come back from the dead? Why was his body still intact after all those years in the lake? Why does Jason wear a mask? How did he keep the rats from eating his mother's head? Why did the local cops not bother investigating anything? How did Jason learn to hook up electricity to his camp? Why didn't the power company notice nobody's paying the electric bill for an abandoned summer camp? Why would Jason keep some girl chained up in his basement? Why do all the locals of Crystal Lake appear to have come from Texas? Why did they bother doing makeup for Jason when they show his face for maybe two frames of the whole movie? Why does Jason pop out of the lake at the end with his mask on? What were they thinking? Why did I see this miserable attempt to remake a great movie? Why am I wasting more time on a bad review? Why are you still reading?

All in all a terrible movie.

Re-Make, Re-Boot, Re-Vamp, Recycle, Re-Use, can't tell the difference? Well, neither can I!

[Smells_Like_Cheese · 7/10 · 19 June 2009]

Tttch, ttch, ttch, ha, ha, ha… Jason Vorhees is back ttch ttch ttch ha ha ha, OK, I'll stop doing that. Well, back in the glorious decade that was known as the 1980's came out a series of slasher films, two of which have stood the test of time and given us Freddy Krueger and Jason Vorhees. The new millennium brought us Freddy vs. Jason, awesome movie, I recommend it, but we still needed a re-boot of the iconic monsters. So we have Friday the 13th, what baffles me is why the title is same of the 1980 film that was a great slumber party movie. This could have been a lot more better if it had worked as a sequel rather than a re-make. Now, don't get me wrong, I felt that this was actually a fun horror movie, the fans get what they want with the blood, gore and sex. But Jason seemed a little off to me, I think he went to rehab or something for his killing addiction, don't know if it was the actor or the director's vision, but this could have been a little bit better.

On June 13, 1980, a young Jason Voorhees witnesses his mother being beheaded by a camp counselor who was trying to escape Mrs. Voorhees's murderous rampage around Camp Crystal Lake. 30 years later, a group of vacationing friends arrive at Crystal Lake on a camping trip. As Mike and Whitney explore the abandoned Crystal Lake camp, Jason begins to kill the rest of the group one-by-one. Jason also kills four of the friends, but instead of doing the same to Whitney he decides to kidnap her because she resembles his mother. Six weeks later, Trent, along with his girlfriend Jenna, and their friends Chewie, Chelsea, Nolan, Bree and Lawrence arrive at Trent's summer cabin, which sits on Crystal Lake, unaware of the events that occurred a few weeks prior. Also in town is Clay, who has come to Crystal Lake searching for his sister Whitney. Clay eventually makes his way to Trent's cabin, where Jenna agrees to help him look for his sister on the other side of the lake, much to Trent's dismay who's jealous of Clay. As Clay and Jenna search for clues to Whitney's disappearance, Jason does what he does best… baking cookies… oh, wait, I got that messed up.

With the recent roll up's of remakes like Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Halloween, coming soon Nightmare on Elm Street, is Hollywood literally that much out of ideas? Like I said before, I think this would have worked better as a sequel, because not having the original creators on set makes the film feel like a bunch of frat guys who just thought "Hey, wouldn't it be cool to make our own Jason movie?". Sometimes we do have a winner with the remakes like Dawn of the Dead or even Texas Chainsaw Massacre had it's moments as well, unfortunately Friday the 13th didn't do anything to stand out against the other movies. I do recommend it for a night rental, it's always cool to see Jason and how awesome his murders are… kudos on the girl in the sleeping bag getting set on fire, what a… burn! Ha ha ha ha ha! I made a funny, ha ha ha, eh, uh, I try, give me some credit.

7/10

Jason Takes Prisoners

[barrynewblood · 2/10 · 15 September 2020]

After an exciting prologue involving your usual sex and pot crazed teenagers being dispatched by murderous woodsman, Jason Voorhees, Friday the 13th flies off the handle and populates the rest of the film with some of the most unlikable characters ever showcased in a slasher film and expects us to care when they're murdered one by one. We have no choice but to root for Jason and, I'm not sure about you, but I like horror movies where I feel bad for the people being stalked and killed.

If the characters aren't absolute morons or jerks, they're boring. We have the lead, Clay, who keeps trying to find his sister, but that's his only major character trait and it's hard to connect with him. Even worse is his sister who spends the entire film cowering in fear and screaming as she's trapped in the killer's secret underground lair.

Friday the 13th is yet another misguided attempt at remaking a classic film that forgets what made the original so compelling and watchable in the first place.

About what I expected

[freaky_dave · 7/10 · 14 February 2009]

THe Friday the 13th films have never been what you would call good movies. For me they have always been guilty pleasures, but not something I would recommend to fans not into gory movies where there are occasional scares but no real suspense built up. After seeing this latest entry, which is really a remake of the first four films into one, I can't really say its bad. Horror movie fans who love creative killings will love it, but if you're not a horror movie fan of the slasher genre, then I really can't tell you to see this movie. However if this is your type of thing, go see it.

Now on with the plot, which I really won't go into detail about because we already know what it's about. It starts off with a pitiful prelude that goes back to 1980 and found me rolling my eyes, but afterward it gets better. Young adults go camping, young adults die in nasty ways. THe one wrinkle added to the story is that one of the character's (Jared Padelecki from Supernatural on the WB) is brought into the story because he is looking for his sister. THis sister was involved with the first group of victims, and now there is this second group who know of nothing that has happened to the other group because it has been about six weeks since the first group went missing. You all know what happens next, so I won't say anything more.

Most of the cast was competent, better then many of the ones from the earlier films. THere were a few who were annoying, but that is part of the Friday The 13th scenario. I like the new Jason because he is much more active in the role, much like the Jason from the 2nd and 3rd entries back in the early to mid 80s.

I will give the movie a solid 7 out of 10. It went out and did what it was supposed to, but if you are more into the suspenseful horror films, and not hack and slash with a few jump scares, then Friday the 13th 2009 is not for you.

Lousy remake/reboot/re-imagining/whatever the latest PR spin word is.

[capkronos · 3/10 · 21 February 2009]

I didn't expect much of anything other than a few memorable kills and maybe a cheap jump scare here and there. This pathetic excuse for a movie couldn't even deliver that much. For starters, I personally can't stand how recent horror movies are shot. Everything has the same dark, muddy and flat-looking quality, with no real clarity of picture and irritating shakycam going into overdrive during 90 percent of the horror/action scenes because far too many directors today aren't talented enough to stage an effective horror or action scene without it. The gore was often even hard to make out because of the camera-work, too, which renders something like this almost completely pointless. And while the 1980s Friday films aren't what I'd call genre classics, you could at least clearly make out the gory scenes instead of getting a split flash of some CGI effect while the cameraman goes into a seizure. Bah-humbug, I know. But I swear I really did try my best to like this one. Honest!

Defenders of this latest bargain basement remake will say things like...

"It's not supposed to have a storyline or plot!" or "The acting is supposed to be bad!" or "The dialogue is supposed to be stupid!" or "The characters are supposed to be unbearably obnoxious and annoying!" or "It's not supposed to be scary!" Well OK then. I'd now like to take the opportunity to congratulate Mr. Nispel for making an unscary, ugly-looking, suspense-free movie with bad acting, terrible dialogue, forgettable kills and annoying characters. Way to go Marcus!

What other "goodies" do we get here? Let's see...

For some reason, the film opens with all the credits but waits until about twenty minutes in to reveal the TITLE.

Half of the dialogue seems to consist of either the "f" word or "dude." And what's up with every person talking to themselves? Every time a person was alone they were having a conversation. With whom? I have no clue. When a floorboard creaks it's not really necessary to have someone say "What was that? I better go upstairs and see what that is!" Or, in Friday remake terms it's more like... "What tha @#!* was that @#!* ? Dayum I need to go up doz @#!*' stairs to investigate me some @#!*!" The characters are all pretty awful - a bunch of annoying, smug, self-satisfied, foul-mouthed twits who seem like they need to immediately be committed to a rehab program. Naturally all the white characters get to pair off and have sex, while no one seems the least bit interested in the one black and one Asian character. Since the black guy can't get laid he's reduced to pleasuring himself while listening to whitey going at it upstairs. At least three different male victims said "What the @#!*?" when they were confronted with Jason. The black guy had a slight variation though since he's black. Seriously, whoever wrote this should be embarrassed.

The cast was also bad. Travis Van Winkle should never act again. What is the appeal of this guy anyway? He can't act for squat and resembles Vincent from the Beauty and the Beast TV series. And Jared Padalecki (though one of the better actors here) would probably look better without the Farrah Fawcett hairdo. I had a very difficult time telling the actresses they hired apart. When blonde #1 was killed and they cut back to the cabin to blonde #2 I was like "I thought she was already dead?" And then there's a missing sister, who I kept confusing with the rich jock's girlfriend toward the end. If you can hire a black and an Asian actor to help diffuse all the shaggy-haired white boys, then why can't you hire an attractive black or Asian actress? Preferrably one who isn't sporting a set of distracting and unnatural-looking silicone cans like several actresses in this film. No wonder Willa Ford couldn't keep herself under water for long! Note to parents: If your daughter begs you for a set of DD bolt-on's for her 18th birthday, get her a Prada handbag instead. She'll thank you later.

The film is full of extremely stupid moments and scenes. Getting hit directly in the head by a speedboat going about 50 miles per hour will only result in a tiny little boo-boo. And the extensive lair of underground catacombs under Jason's house? Did Jason dig all that out or is it some sewer system in the middle of the woods? Maybe a former coal mine... with an escape hatch through an overturned school bus? Whaaaaaaa? Then we have Jason keeping a hostage. Well, the Jason I like don't play like that. Are they trying to now "humanize" him like Rob Zombie did with Michael Myers in his equally wretched "remake" of HALLOWEEN? Urghhh...

It all leads up to an ending that fails just as badly as the rest of the movie. The original has that legendary moment that made people jump from their seats while the people who made this botched that opportunity because of a completely awful editing cut. So sad to say, this was sloppy, irritating and pretty much just plain boring. It could have been fun. It's not. JASON GOES TO HELL and JASON X were even better than this!

A whole lot of fun if you know what you are in for

[DonFishies · 7/10 · 13 February 2009]

Jason.

The hockey mask.

The machete.

That ominous theme that sounds a lot like "Kill, Kill, Kill."

Anyone with any knowledge of the horror genre has undoubtedly come across this villainous icon who practically sprayed theatres with blood throughout the 1980s. Although he pretty much became a parody of himself in Jason X and then was basically (and wrongly) turned into a psychologically tormented Frankenstein's Monster-style creature in Freddy vs. Jason, the beast was always remembered for who he originally was.

And that is what makes the new remake/reimagining of Friday the 13th such a success (for the most part). Despite being written by Damian Shannon and Mark Swift, the same guys who brutalized Freddy vs. Jason, they wisely went back to the basics that made the character so popular. Sure, he runs now, but he is a hulking beast again. There is a bit of added development in the relationship Jason has with his mother, but the story remains the same. He is still taking revenge on sex-crazed teenagers stupid enough to want to camp on Crystal Lake.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Halloween and to an extent, The Hills Have Eyes, all went down the route of making their deranged killers need to have parental issues in order to establish their motives as adults. For some reason, there seemed to need to be a reason for these killers to be the way they are. They simply could not exist as being demented and totally sick-in-the-head. Friday the 13th does not bother with any of that. Sure, there is a plot twist that will make any devotee or fan squirm with repulsion, but it still makes sense in the grand scheme of who Jason was and is now. The character has no added dimension completely taking away from how terrifying he is, and making him into a misunderstood infant. For that alone, the movie is more than worth the price of admission.

Another wise choice is sticking to the formula. The filmmakers here (including director Marcus Nispel of Texas Chainsaw remake fame) have made what is basically an homage to the series. Instead of trying to completely redo and rebrand the character for a 2009 audience, the film amalgamates everything everyone loved about the series that made them come back for ten sequels. Remember the gratuitous amount of breasts and graphic sex scenes? They are here, and just as graphic as ever. Remember the goofy dialogue, and total lack of any knowledge shown by the characters in trying to combat themselves against this machete-wielding maniac? Its back too. And remember all those ridiculously violent kills?

Well, they are back too.

The film knows its genre, and it knows its audience. It throws plenty of cheap scares at a moment's notice, and offers just enough laughs (both intentional and unintentional) to keep the audience invested in the movie. And when the actual scares come, the film manages to keep the audience transfixed at those moments too (whether they are screaming in fear or laughing from how ridiculous the scene is). Rather tastefully, the deaths are gruesome, but not to the point of overkill like in the Saw series or even within The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Sure, there are some points where it may be hard not to wince, but it never seems like the filmmakers want to push the audience to the limit. They ground themselves in reality (for as real a situation as this story seems), and very rarely do they cross that barrier. They know which buttons they want to push, and which they want to stay well away from. And instead of exploiting the genre, they embrace it and somehow do not make things too disgusting for themselves. None of them may look innovative, but they work for the type of movie it is trying to be.

But for all the praising, the film is obviously imperfect. Leaving aside the ridiculous twist in the middle of the film and the total lack of character development (albeit, totally expected, but upsetting nonetheless), the film drags its heels getting to the finale. There is a very dry spot as the film nears its third act that borders on boring, and seems more like a forced narrative device to stretch the running time out. I have more than enough faith to see that they clearly could have added more running and screaming to some scenes, and still could have gotten a better effect. Some scenes seem marred by trying to be tense and failing as well. But of course, it is pretty hard for a scene to be tense when you are cheering for the killer as opposed to the victim.

The film also suffers from the slapdash editing that plagues modern horror and action films. In some instances, it is almost impossible to be scared because we barely see what is going on in the scene. It merely shows Jason show up, the person make their movie, and then a quick cut of what Jason does. Some scenes linger on the aftermath, but some happen and disappear quicker than you anyone would think. The fact that the film is not incredibly gory only makes it seem all the sillier to be so horrendously edited in some areas.

Some of the actors could have tried a little harder too, but that is just a nitpicking gripe.

In the end, Friday the 13th is a whole lot of fun. I did not think I would enjoy it at all, but I ended up being surprised at how reverent the film was to the series. Granted you know what to expect from a film featuring Jason Voorhees as the main character, than you should not go home disappointed.

And coming from a remake, that is saying quite a lot.

7/10.

(An edited version of this review also appeared on http://www.geekspeakmagazine.com).

This garbage is Friday THE 13TH meets Farrelly Brothers meets Texas CHAINSAW MASSACRE

[Andy-1981 · 1/10 · 20 February 2009]

(Slight spoilers, though nothing major. Hell, the whole rotten movie is a "spoiler")

Upon viewing the opening third of this movie, I swear I thought the film had been written by Peter and Bobby Farrelly (the talentless brothers behind such pieces of dung such as THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY, and ME, MYSELF, AND IRENE) because the film assaulted the audience with embarrassingly crude, off-color, profanity-ridden dialogue.

The film also stoops to presenting distressingly stereotypical characters, including blatantly adding the token black guy and the token Asian guy and then tries to poke fun at it! ("Just because I'm black, that mean I can't listen to Green Day?") The film didn't get any better from there.

As a longtime, die-hard Friday fan, I cringed as I watched the filmmakers completely destroy the myth and character of Jason Voorhees by turning him into a psycho, inbred redneck -- directly out of the Texas CHAINSAW series (directed by an individual who directed the crappy remake of that, and using actors from that remake too!). Absurd was the plot point of Jason holding the girl hostage (for reasons that were never truly made clear)-- since when has Jason EVER done anything like that? Oh right, we're making him into Leatherface now.

The lighting was awful, the kills were mostly too fast and too dark to be enjoyed, Derek Mears was OK but unremarkable as Jason. I'll credit him for doing the best with the sickeningly bad material he had to work with.

Worst of all, the film tries to have it both ways -- it tries to create a scary Jason, but makes the characters so repugnantly unappealing that the audience is rooting for Jason. You can't have your cake and eat it too: either have a scary Jason that we're rooting against because he's the villain, or portray him as the (anti)hero who's there to wipe out teenage scum. Not both.

A couple good touches, such as the topless skiing scene (even though that didn't show off what it could've) and the ax kill (now THAT was pure Jason) can even begin to save this pile of sludge. But I'm sure we'll have another awful remake (or sequel to a remake), since this crap hit it big at the box office.

Grade Z tripe.

I genuinely don't understand the hate

[brenthood00-951-475255 · 9/10 · 23 September 2021]

This is still one of the best horror remakes I've ever seen. It's got everything you could want in a horror movie, and they made Jason more beastly than ever! Good for die hard fans and newcomers!!

There's not too many movies I could watch multiple times and enjoy just as much every time. Great cast too! It might not necessarily be anything "new" but it certainly breathed new life into the franchise, modern Jason rules lol.

I don't know what else to say, anyone who hates this doesn't truly appreciate horror movies.

Say what you will critics, but it's definite fun for slasher fans!

[Nightman85 · 7/10 · 14 February 2009]

Teenagers head out to Crystal Lake, NJ where they encounter murderous Jason and his handy machete...

Make no mistake horror fans, Friday the 13th 2009 isn't exactly a remake of the 1980 slasher classic (save for the opening five minutes), but really more of another sequel to the popular series. Even still Friday' fans will find much to enjoy in this splashy, well-made slasher flick. The film makes no pretensions, it's a slasher film and acts like one too! The action arrives hard and fast, with bloody brutal kill sequences and some intense chase scenes. There's also a dash of dark humor (and plenty of topless actresses) thrown in for good measure.

So I can't complain that there's little character development or that the movie is riddled with clichés and stereotypes because this film is wise enough to dispense with the myriad BS and get to the elements that Friday' fans enjoy. Good choice. My only big complaint is the fact that Harry Manfredini's iconic theme music wasn't featured much, if any, in the movie. I did miss that ki-ki-ki ma-ma-ma.

Worth your money horror fans, as this is one of the best Friday' movies in many years.

** 1/2 out of ****

Makes original look like Citizen Kane

[fritzlang · 1/10 · 26 December 2009]

Look, I know F13 series was never high art. it was never really clever (except maybe part 6).. it was camp. but in general, it was fun.

This film alternated between three moods

1) nothing. I mean there is at least ONE HOUR where NOTHING HAPPENS! a bunch of moronic, profanity-laden kids TALK!!! No suspense. No horror. No humor.. NOTHING!!

2) Sex. Hey, part of the slasher genre is some sex scenes. But this felt more like soft-porn. There was one sex scene that felt like it went on for TWENTY MINUTES.. I didn't clock it, but it sure felt like it to me. These scenes went WAY beyond T&A or tease. I actually felt uncomfortable watching some of these.

3) Sadistic-torture porn. When Jason was around it felt more like a Saw movie, or maybe the remake of the Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Jason TORTURES his victims? Huh? Instead of a supernatural zombie he is more in line with a sadistic serial killer. a VERY different personality, and one that I felt was repugnant. In the original, Jason was alternately fun and scary. In this, he was just a sicko. Ugh.

This pretty much sums up the movie for me.

Oh, except one more thing. It looks like they used the lights over from AvP:Requiem. The scenes were TOO dark to see. And the Michael Bay 2-second scenes just made it worse! This wasn't some heavy cheap=CGI that had to be 'hidden' with low lit scenes and fast cutting!! I couldn't take it anymore.. And found myself fast forwarding to get through the picture.. Every time I played the movie it was one of the above 3 moods..

I never thought I would appreciate the 1980 original so much. That was truly a brilliant piece of film-making compared to this.

I have NO idea of who/why someone would like to see this. I am seeing some folks giving this high marks, so obviously it is filling a need. Just one that I don't understand.

Where was the fun?

If there are sequels to this reboot,then I will pass..

Another Nispel "masterpiece"

[captrose · 1/10 · 17 February 2009]

Here is the usual "SPOILERS ahead" warning. Read at your own peril!! I've always been a F13/Jason fan. Can't say I was excited about the remake being produced by Michael Bay but at least I hoped we would get some cool new special edition dvds (which we did). So expecting nothing and knowing I had my old favorites still to watch I went to check it out.

Have to say I was under impressed. One of the charms for me about F13 has always been the fact the movies didn't take themselves very serious. The creators might disagree with that statement but come on, how do you explain his healing factor, the fact Jason never runs but somehow always get ahead of his victim and his "victim radar"? This new movie tries really hard to make it "realistic". Jason runs (*sigh*) after his victims. (Runs? Runs? Jason doesn't run!) There is some sort of crazy mine below Camp Crystal Lake (?) that Jason now uses to get around (because the director wanted a mine. You know, a generic mine, not any particular kind). Along with bear traps and trip wires to let him know where people are. Some half buried bus to come out of ... somewhere on the camp ground. We only get one "Kill, kill, kill, Ma, ma, ma" when he finds the hockey mask. (I remember reading that the new creators wanted to have some "meaning" about why and where he got the mask. Guess they forgot that because it's the same thing, he finds it.) And oh yeah, not much happens at the camp because the producer, Michael "Big Explosion" Bay, thinks that summer camps aren't scary. That reminds me of the director for a Captain America movie who said he hated the costume so he kept the hero out of costume as much as possible. Where the Hell do they get these people? It's more of a remake of F12 Part 3, than Part 1 or Part 2 though there are parts of both in it. Nana Visitor is utterly wasted as the new Mrs. Voorhees. There are some great comments over at Stacy Ponder's Final Girl blog review. Then I found out something that would have kept me totally away from the flick, the director is the same guy who did the god-awful remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre from a few years back (Marcus Nispel). Honestly, if I had known that, I wouldn't have wasted the $9.50 nor the time. But, I would have warned you my friends, this guy doesn't ever need to make a movie again. Let alone another "horror" movie.

It's not totally horrible and I'm sure the kids who like the remakes of the current time will like it. But for this old timer, it takes the parts of F13 I liked and totally ejects them in favor or "realism". Honestly, it makes me worry even more about the upcoming "new" Star Trek.

For old fans, I would recommend picking up the new versions of F13 1-3 and "His Name Was Jason". F13 P3 is finally in 3D, and His Name Was Jason is hosted by Tom Savini. All kinds of 80's slasher goodness there. Don't forget the original "Valentine's Day Massacre" just released, also uncut for the first time ever. You'll enjoy it more than this remake.

I'll give it 1 hockey mask out of 5.

This hockey-mask wearing stalker Jason will not disappoint you

[the-movie-guy · 6/10 · 10 February 2009]

(Synopsis) Clay Miller (Jared Padalecki) travels to Crystal Lake, the last known location that his missing sister Whitney (Amanda Righetti) was seen. The police have searched with no luck, and Clay is searching alone. Local citizens have advised Clay not to go into those woods, because anyone who shows up missing is already dead, and he is wasting his time. Their warnings go unheard, because he must find and rescue his sister. During the search, Clay meets a group of thrill-seeking college students who have just arrived at Crystal Lake for a weekend of sex, booze and pot smoking. One of the students, Jenna (Danielle Panabaker) decides to help Clay find his sister, and they go into the woods. They find the abandoned Camp Crystal Lake and search the dilapidated camp house for any signs of his sister. They soon see why people don't come to these woods, because they encounter the evil and psychopathic killer, Jason Voorhees (Derek Mears).

(My Comment) This is your typical teen slasher horror movie. By now, everybody should know that you don't enter the haunted domain of Jason, or you deserve what you get. We now have a bigger and stronger Jason who hunts his prey and not only uses his razor-sharp machete, but other instruments to carry out his nightmarish revenge. There are some terrifying scares scenes that made me jump, luckily there was no one sitting next to me. If you like slasher movies, the hockey-mask wearing stalker Jason will not disappoint, and you will have a bloody good time as Jason increases his body count. I was glad when it was over, because I couldn't take much more of this traumatic experience. (Warner Bros., Run Time 1:37, Rated R)(6/10)

A Travesty!!!

[krazyjym · 1/10 · 13 February 2009]

Jasons runs? What a bunch of bunk. He's a slow, plodding stalker. He's supposed to take his time while you run from him. Yet, somehow he beats you there. That used to be a common theme, a sort of impending doom. No matter what you do you will not be able to escape. In this piece of junk, he runs.

Jason thinks? That's right. He has traps set. And warning systems in place.

Jason takes prisoners? That's right. He's smart enough to think clearly enough to set traps and warning systems, but he's not smart enough to understand that a teenage girl ISN'T his mother.

Did I mention that Jason runs? Seriously. I'm still angry about this.

None of the characters are even remotely likable. They are overly done stereotypes, but not the stereotypes we all know and love. They are just dumb versions of stereotypes.

None of the deaths are even remotely memorable. They are just your average run of the mill "someone gets stabbed with something" kinds of deaths.

Seriously, Jason runs almost the entire movie!!!! For me, though, the topper of it all is that Jason didn't once get confused and tilt his head. Not once. And he had quite a few opportunities to do so. Like when he was running he should have looked at himself and thought "This makes no sense." Or when he was setting traps and warning systems. Or when he was holding a girl hostage because she kinda looked like his mom.

This movie almost makes Jason X look like a decent movie.

Friday the 13th delivers!

[alternate-dan · 7/10 · 13 February 2009]

With an excellent crowd of audience, a fresh, new take on Friday the 13th "remake" and Jason Voorhees back to his original roots at Crystal Lake…I couldn't be more entertained than I was during this wild slasher flick.

Plot crunch: Friends Wade, Amanda, Richie, Whitney and her boyfriend Mike go camping at Crystal Lake in search for a field of growing Marijuana plants that appears to be somewhere close to the old, rusty and legendary Camp Crystal Lake. However, after Wade has spooked his crew by the of Jason Voorhees, they never thought they'd actually stumble upon the killer himself. Turns out that Jason isn't just a legend, and he starts the new Friday the 13th with insane killing sequences. Then we meet Clay Miller who returns once again, apparently, to Crystal Lake to look for his missing sister Whitney, who was last seen near Crystal Lake. Hee meets a group of college kids who are spending a wild weekend at one rich kid's parent's cabin. The following kids are alpha male Trent, who seems to be provoked by Clay after his date for the weekend; good-girl Jenna, helps him look around in the woods, slutty Bree, hilarious token (Asian) Chewie and (African-American) Lawrence, free-spirited Chelsea and sex-seeking Nolan. But as soon as Jason finds out that they are in his woods, all hell breaks loose. On Friday the 13th, the kids wind up in Jason's vicious hands and suffer horrible fates as the day rushes to a heart pounding night of terror at Crystal Lake.

First: The movie was bad-ass. As a big fan of most of Friday the 13th films (Part 1 to 5 mainly, Part 2 being my all-time favorite), I could see some fun references that were in the original movies of the series. There's enough fun nudity and sex sequences, but they aren't really that rough and instead make them look funny as Jason attempts to distract one of the couples for his next prey. The killing/death sequences are very, very disturbing during some parts (a girl is burned alive inside a sleeping bag that hangs above a campfire, a guy is tortured with an ax thrown into his back but Jason ruthlessly pushes him on the back and it impales through his chest, and one guy is impaled but that's not enough…he's shoved onto a back of a truck with these poles sticking out and it impales him so badly, then the car drives off with his feet dragging along the road).

Second: Jason was insane. I haven't seen him so ruthless and brutal since Part 7 (in his uncut killing sequences that were trimmed down by the MPAA, but search for them on YouTube). And the best thing I liked about him is that he ran furiously after some of his victims. He did walk, but oh boy, did he run too! He wasn't super-human…well, up until the end he kind of was, but hey, he had a thick neck! But throughout the entire movie, his victims managed to injure him. However, it didn't stop him from killing some more. My only problem was that Jason't wasn't too much on screen, because I would've wanted to see more scenes on him. But the movie was only 97 minutes so I'm bumped for the unrated DVD release.

Third: For me, the acting was slightly above-average for actors who I'd never seen before (Willa Ford, Julianna Guill, Arlen Escarpeta and Jonathan Sadowski). Jared Padalecki and Danielle Panabaker were quite a good leading couple, and Amanda Righetti's performance was really good. But cut to characters. Despite for all of them being stunning and beautiful, I enjoyed every single one of them, but I just couldn't help but to want to know something more about them. I knew what everyone's names were from looking at the film's IMDb page but I didn't hear many characters' names up until near the end. More character development, or simply less characters in the movie, would have done justice for me. But I prefer Whitney and co. over Trent and co.

Fourth: Now I'm really not a guy who notices if one's directing on a movie is good or not. Don't blame me, I just forget and I barely know how to spot it. But all I can say is that I think Marcus Nispel did a fine job on this new Friday the 13th, and I surprisingly didn't see much similarity or style to his take on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake, since some people seem to notice. This movie, however, should have been longer than only 97 minutes. Some parts felt kind of rushed and some characters didn't really get to shine. Let's just say that the phase could have worked out better. And one last thing, the writing could have been strictly better. There wasn't enough suspense like in the first four Friday flicks.

But here are some "best of the best" in the movie that I want to share. Favorite character: I would have to say either Chewie or Lawrence because those two were hilarious, but my vote goes to Trent. You can't help but to love to hate the guy! Favorite death sequence: It's a tie between the sleeping-bag-on-fire and impaled-by-poles-on-truck.

Overall: I give this a solid 8/10 for being a crazy-fun bloody slasher ride and Jason's return was phenomenon. Plus, one of my favorite "teen-idol" actors—Padalecki—was playing the lead role and I think he did good. I actually didn't see one bit of Sam Winchester there, to be honest. In addition, I had a very, very good and lively crowd inside the theater. I couldn't have asked for a better Friday night at the movies.

As a fan of the Friday the 13th franchise, this one is a strong entry to a reboot.

The worst Friday yet

[Leofwine_draca · 2/10 · 10 December 2011]

Of all the horror remakes of recent years, Friday THE 13TH has to be one of the worst. The reason? Because it fails to find a voice and style of its own, content instead to derivatively copy the look and feel of a dozen inferior horror outings such as WRONG TURN and THE Texas CHAINSAW MASSACRE remake. It starts off by following the plot of the first three films – featuring Mrs Vorhees, sack-head Jason and hockey mask Jason – before falling apart entirely with cliché after cliché as the killer goes after a bunch of dull people.

This film fails because it doesn't have a single interesting character – least of all bland Jason, who doesn't have anything approaching the brutality of the killer once played by Kane Hodder. The victims are all of them irritating and faceless, so you'll look forward to seeing them die – except even the death scenes are unmemorable. A week after watching this and I don't recall a single murder from the film, it's that dull and lacking in creativity. The filmmakers throw in plenty of nudity in an attempt to liven things up, but needless to say it's not enough to sustain the movie. Even the godawful sequels, like JASON TAKES MANHATTAN, were better than this!

This movie was thrilling, exciting and the perfect remake!

[Lights_Camera_Reaction · 7/10 · 15 February 2009]

This new Friday movie has those references to the early Friday films, which is a massive positive. Here's my number one thing I look for in any remake: It holds true to the original, but it brings new, insightful, and creative elements to the table.

That's exactly what this Friday the 13th did. It took elements from the originals and expanded on them. The opening credit sequence was A) some of the best editing I've seen in a film lately, and B) tension-filled. Very rarely in horror films am I in awe, first of all, and secondly, scared. For some reason, this opening scene had my heart beating. Could have been the loudness, the flashing, the black-and-white, I don't know, but it was something this film had to offer - i.e. respectable.

The scene following immediately was another scene where I could not believe my eyes. The dialogue was REAL. That is how people that age talk, that is how my friends and I talk, it was real. That was entertaining. That was comedy. This movie took us to a level where we are able to care about these characters, not because they're just going to bang and die, but because these people are just like the people we know. We would be shocked if this happened to our friends, obviously.

Jason, in this scene, is brutal. He burns a girl as she's in a sleeping bag hanging over a fire, he uses a bear-trap to trap a victim, rather than just stalk and kill, like he's Rambo. This is a NEW Jason. Get that, people. He's NEW. This is a revamp. This is believable. This is where the new Halloween failed, guys. Halloween expanded on that childhood and made us empathize even though the new Michael was a pyschopath. Jason, on the other hand, is a hunter. He is a killer. He is pyschotic and human, i.e. terrifying.

The rest of this movie offers laughs, tension, terror, blood, but not too much, and you know what? Now, that's refreshing. Too often do movies use gore and blood as a crutch. A movie like The Hills Have Eyes offered a lot of blood and gore, a lot of shocks and terror, but it was actually really good.

And I'm not someone who loves every remake, because I don't. I hated Halloween, and I hated Texas Chainsaw. Both failed in my mind because, well, I've stated Halloween's reason already, but TCM failed because it was just... too much of a remake. Not a lot was brought to the table, and strangely, it was slow. It's as if the writers and director (yes, I realize they're the same as Friday), wanted to do that kind of indie-film technique and slow it down, pace it, etc. But, Friday the 13th did that, and it was very well done. There are parts that are slow and attempt to calm us down as the audience, and there are parts that are relentless. That is needed. And because of that slowness and relentlessness at different times, this film IS reminiscent of the original series. It has that indie-quality, yet is Hollywood with a budget.

The only thing I would change, going with the Hollywood thing, is the ending. My perfect ending would have been to let Jason keep his head bouncing on the chipper. The two take a breather and watch him. Perhaps one last close up of Jason? The final two characters begin to walk as the guy puts his arm around his kid sister's shoulder. They limp out of the barn as the light leaves them in silhouette outside. Jason's head bounces still to the left of frame. We slowly fade to black.

I didn't hate the ending of this one. But I just love the fact of having a stand-alone movie. This ending has an open-ending, by the way, but no studio would use it because it doesn't have that punch. To me, that punch happened in the chain sequence. We needed that unwind throughout them leaving and the credits. Then reflect, and love it.

Michael Bay creates a new acronym: CHIRGO

[Critomaton · 1/10 · 15 February 2009]

It stands for "Classic Horror In, Re-imagined Garbage Out". You can substitute "Camp" or "Crap" for the C, depending upon how you feel about the original "Friday the 13th" - the rest of the acronym remains the same.

The re-imagined "Friday the 13th" isn't scary. It isn't creepy. It isn't suspenseful. It isn't funny at any point, and it's only the slightest bit sexy. It doesn't add anything to the Jason mystique or, for that matter, to the "unstoppable boogeyman" archetype in cinematic horror.

The characters in this flick are so one-dimensional they make all the throwaway performances from previous installments of the series look positively Oscar-worthy. And that includes episodes 5-9, which are hard to beat on the Unwatchable Meter.

As many have noted, the lighting in a lot of scenes is bad. This is probably done for realism, but frankly it doesn't detract too much because you never feel like there's much to see anyway. Likewise for the relatively sparing use of shakycam.

Considering all the things they might have updated 29 years later, there really seems to have been little thought put into this movie. Yeah, there's more sex and nudity than in the original installments, but it doesn't seem that over the top and it definitely isn't titillating. Most of it is accompanied by insanely annoying dialogue.

There are plenty of scenes that will make you cringe and groan for their stupidity, but I don't want to include any spoilers, so I'll skip them.

Instead, I'll just mention the two most memorable non-spoilers:

1) There is gratuitous use of sudden loud noises to create shock or suspense when none would otherwise exist. Lots of movies do this when they can't be scary - I can't think of another one that does it so often or so loudly.

2) There is also a major preoccupation with weed. Was "Pineapple Express" that big a hit?

If there is any horror in this movie at all, it is that Amanda Righetti and Willa Ford felt it necessary to star in it to advance their careers.

This movie does to the "Friday the 13th" franchise what "Quantum of Solace" did to James Bond. I hope Bond can be revived somehow. I no longer have the slightest interest in the goings-on at Camp Crystal Lake.

Balance not quite right

[jtindahouse · 8/10 · 12 February 2009]

Friday the 13th has an incredibly powerful first 15-20 minutes. It really kicks off with a bang. Jason is back better than ever. Then something goes fractionally wrong and we fall back into old territory. Everything becomes a bit too familiar. Still, it does better than most horror films in the sense that it really doesn't become too tedious until the last 10 minutes or so.

The main characters are strong in their performance without being memorable. The cameos are the real scene stealers including a gas station attendant and a man named Donnie. A lot of the jokes from all concerned really hit the mark though and are a nice touch to the film.

The Friday the 13th remake is what it is and at the end of the day probably all that could realistically have been hoped for. It won't decrease the seemingly ever growing hate of remakes, but it certainly won't add to it either and that in itself is an achievement.

"It's Gotta Death Curse!!!"

[skeletonman13 · 7/10 · 13 February 2009]

They should've listened to Crazy Ralf 30 years ago....

I didn't grow up watching the series, but I bought the box set when it came out and watched the whole series, I saw the New Line Series as well. I am in love with Friday the 13th. And seriously, every day of this month, I watched one F13th film leading up to this remake/reboot.

And now, on to the movie.

Friday the 13th is the thrill ride we've been waiting for. It has it all. Gore, Tits, Drugs, and most importantly...Jason! The film starts off with a fast-paced 10-15 minutes. Some creepy guy killing of 5 horny teenagers looking to harvest some weed. And who is this creepy old guy that wears a sack over his head? Jason!! And boy, Jason is back, in a big way! Then we are introduced to Clay, searching for his sister who has been missing for 6 weeks, who was part of the group that Jason killed off in the first 10-15 minutes...only with one survivor. A group of teenagers is staying at a Cabin in the woods...sound familiar? And Jason decides to drop by...and all hell breaks loose.

Friday the 13th '09 was worth the wait, it is a fast-paced roller coaster that gives us what we want. The deaths are freakin sweet, and trust me, there is a lot of the red stuff. Jason is a badass in this one. He kills with anything he can get his hands on to.

Seriously, Die hard fan or causal horror fan...this is a must see not matter what. Trust me, this one really delivers. 10 stars!

A nearly worthless remake

[joeampfan · 2/10 · 21 July 2010]

Friday the 13th fans beware of this one. The scares just weren't' there. Why does Jasons run now? And why does he think out his traps and all that. That is not how Jason is supposed to behave. He is supposed to be slow and scary and without thinking out plans and warning systems. Also, it makes no sense Jason would take prisoners. The killings are not memorable either. Not that it matters much, because no one is even slightly likable. They are all pathetic stereotypes that are more idiotic than the original characters. By the way, it was so laughable the way Jason held the girl because she resembled his mother. Seriously, unless you want to see a classic horror film destroyed, skip it, or if you must see it, catch it for free on TV. I was hoping this would at least have some good scares, but I was let down. Even the TCS remake was better than this and that is not saying much.

A Cut Below Average for a Jason Movie

[zardoz-13 · 4/10 · 17 February 2009]

Jason is back with a murderous vengeance in "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" remake director Marcus Nispel's "Friday the 13th" (** out of ****), and he doesn't aim to please. This invincible villain with his attitude toward pre-marital sex has changed. Essentially, the new "Friday the 13th" synthesizes Sean S. Cunningham's above-average original along with Steve Minor's first and second gratuitous sequels to deliver the maximum amount of mayhem. Nevertheless, despite its slick, ultra-polished production values, nudity, and carnage, this "Friday" lacks a shred of creativity. Clearly, nobody expected anything fresh from the new "Friday the 13th," but Nispel's remake shows more interest in Jason than Jason's truly demented mother. Gorehounds weaned on the "Saw" sagas will gripe about the lack of brutality. Everybody else will feel like they've suffered through a nightmare in a hospital emergency room. Prudes will carp about the soft-core porno scenes and the voyeurism that panders to its lusty teenage audience. Bluntly, "Friday the 13th" generates no suspense, but does a number on your eardrums.

The original "Friday the 13th" dealt with a mom gone amok over the drowning death of her son while teenage counselors who were supposed to be watching him indulged in sex. Mrs. Voorhees vented her rage and cut a swathe with a machete through those amorously distracted teenagers. Indeed, Jason appeared only at the last moment in Cunningham's 1980 original and he was only a boy. Incidentally, the first "Friday the 13th" helped launch the slasher genre a couple of years of John Carpenter's mildly bloody "Halloween." Mind you, Jason didn't don the hockey mask that provided him with more personality than any other slasher stalker until the second sequel, "Friday the 13th in 3-D (1982) and by that time his immortality was taken for granted. After all, Jason is basically supernatural. He has more lives than a cat. He's been frozen, blasted into outer space, and consigned to Hell with few ill effects. A mute, inexorable, slaughter machine with the mentality of a battery powered hare, Jason is Death personified. The new Jason, however, takes on some of the characteristics—not surprisingly—of Leatherface from the "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" franchise. Jason operates in and around Camp Crystal Lake, where he drowned as a youth, like a cunning Viet Cong guerrilla, living in a maze of tunnels with booby-traps galore. Boasting his usual god-like omnipotence, he is tall, dark, and deadly. You never know where he is going to strike and where his weapon of choice will penetrate you.

The problem with the new "Friday" is Nispel disposes of Mrs. Voorhees in the first few moments without giving the dame her due. The Damian Shannon & Mark Swift screenplay doesn't take place in Camp Crystal Lake, and nobody is trying to refurnish the old campgrounds. Instead, the latest lambs for Jason's machete are a half-dozen, college-aged hikers searching for marihuana growing wild on Jason's stomping grounds. This subplot recalls the Leonardo DiCaprio movie "The Beach" where college kids swarmed into a pot field and died at the hands of machine-gun armed natives! Of course, these kids don't have a clue that they're trespassing on Jason's bailiwick. Our deformed killer dispatches them with extreme prejudice in the first 30 minutes. In a throwback to an earlier Jason sequel, he bundles a babe into a sleeping bag and smokes her to death over a fire. Unmistakably, Nispel is paying homage to Jason bashing a girl trapped in a sleeping bag against a tree in "Friday the 13th Part VII—The New Blood" (1988).

In a departure from the norm, Jason takes one of these girls, Whitney Miller (Amanda Righetti of "Role Models"), hostage because she reminds him of mom. He keeps her chained up in his subterranean lair. Later, to her credit, Whitney parlays her resemblance to Mrs. Voorhees to her advantage. Whitney's motorcycle riding brother, Clay (Jared Padelecki of TV's "Supernatural"), is scouring Camp Crystal Lake for her and handing out missing posters. Clay is reminiscent of Rob in "Friday the 13th Part IV: Jason Lives" (1986) who wanted to kill Jason for slaughtering his sister. Anyway, Clay encounters a group of obnoxious twentysomethings hanging out at a cabin on Crystal Lake. These kids look like they stepped out of a WB soap opera. They are pretty, but bland, except for Asian-American Aaron Yoo of "Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist" who provides some comic relief. Eventually, Clay finds Whitney, but by then Jason has appropriated his hockey mask, whittled down virtually nondescript nitwits, and bears down on the hero and heroine. Nispel generates his scares with sudden bursts of deafening music timed with occur with Jason's sudden appearances. Everything is rather dull when Jason isn't slashing and gashing his victims. "Pathfinder" lenser Daniel Pearl's atmospheric photography creates a modicum of mood. Incredibly, Nispel doesn't take full advantage of Harry Manfredini's memorable "ch-ch-ch/pa-pa" music. Comparatively, Nispel's unsubtle remake makes Sean S. Cunningham's original slasher look Shakespearean.

i hated this

[Jamie_Seaton · 8 August 2009]

i hated the original and now i hate this, the Friday 13th collection are worthless slasher flicks that have nothing going for them. there's not one thing i can say about this film thats good. the acting was worse than poor and just the whole flow of the movie made me feel angry and appalled. i knew before i started watching it that it was gonna be a poorly made teen slasher film. the original is just as bad, i dunno how the original has become a some what cult film. i just think people should leave originals that are bad and not to make remakes because there only going to be worse. i actually didn't get to the end of the film. i left before it finished, so by some form of magic the last 20 minutes was good then i'm sorry but i seriously doubt it. avoid this like the plague !!! 1/10 j.d seaton